gone,, norenmin

♥Lonely♥

!trigger warning!
rape!
abuse!
(starts at the italicized words)

I basically live in the WayV dorm but I still spend a lot of time in the Dreamie dorm with the others. Jeno has practically moved into my bedroom since he's officially my therapy cat, don't question it.

Jaemin spends a few nights a week in my room but Jeno spends almost every night, that I'm there, because I still stay overnight at the WayV dorm in Kun and Ten's room. 

I've been eating according to the food plan that the doctor send home with us when we went there. At the end of every week, Kun and I will go into the bathroom and see if I've gained any weight back but the number hardly goes up. 

It's frustrating. All I want to do is gain back weight but it just refuses to stay. I'm in my bedroom in the dreamie dorm sitting criss-cross apple sauce on my made bed. 

I had my head in my hands and was crying. I was so frustrated. I can't gain any weight back, I can't dance anymore, and I feel like a heavyweight on Kun and Ten's shoulders. 

Jeno's cat walked into my room and jumped on my bed and curled up next to me. I pulled it onto my lap and pet it while crying. 

"Why am I so useless," I cried out into the empty dorm.

"Why am I so weak!"

"Why am I even still in the group!"

"Why don't I move back to China!"

"I'm a useless piece of shit!"I screamed.

"RENJUNNIE WE'RE HOME," I heard Jeno yell from the living room. I set the cat on my bed as I tucked myself in and pretended to sleep as my door was pushed open by Jeno. 

"Aw, he's sleeping, "Jeno said to someone else. He walked over to me and brushed my hair out of my face and kissed my cheek."It looks like he's been crying again, "Jeno's voice got quieter and then my door shut. 

"Stay with me, please, don't leave, "I cried quietly as my eyes shut and a deep sleep captured my mind.

!trigger warning!

I was thrown against the wall as the man charged at me like a bull. He put his arms on my sides of me and pushed me down.

"Open your fucking mouth you little slut," he yelled out. I sealed my lips shut and that made him madder. He took his hand and squished my face and pushed his thumb into my mouth opening it.

His pants were unbuckled and he pushed my face onto his dick. I gagged and he continued to yell and curse at me. I cried as he pushed my face further down it and then he started to move. My throat ripped and pain-filled me. 

He had a firm hold on my hair and kept pulling at it. I could feel pain in every corner of my body.

He pulled out and threw me around so I was facing away from him."NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, "I screamed and wiggled around trying to get the wall to swallow me. 

He slapped my ass and grabbed my hips tight before ripping my walls open. I screamed in pain and hit the wall with my fists. 

Tears flow like a river down my face. He pulled out and red and white dripped out of my asshole. He punched me and kicked me as I slid down the wall. I shook in pain and more pain entered my body with each punch, with each kick. 

I shot up and screamed."No, stop, get away from me, "I screamed over and over as tears raced down my face. 

"It hurts, pain, you fucking asshole, "I yelled kicking. Jeno ran into my room and tried to hug me but I pushed him away and ran out still seeing the man and the house I was in for all those months. 

I threw the door opened and I feld strong arms being thrown around me."LET ME GO YOU OLD FUCKING CREEP, GET YOUR GROSS FUCKING DICK AWAY FROM ME YOU PERV, "I yelled trying to wiggle free from who I thought was the dead man.

"Renjun-ah, it's me, "I heard the deep honey voice of Lucas say."Open your eyes," he whispered in my ears, his warm breath fanning against my skin making shivers run up my spin. 

I opened them and saw our dorms. I looked at the person holding me and saw Lucas. I looked behind me and saw everyone in our dorm standing there. 

Other members ran into the hall, Jaehyun holding a bat, Johnny a frying pan, WinWin had a knife in his hand and a cooking robe on.

They looked around and found no one that was endangering me or the others and calmed down. 

Lucas hugged me and I let his warmth calm me down. I started crying and turned away from the others and buried my head in Lucas's chest soaking his white t-shirt. 

"I'm sorry," I cried quietly.

"Sorry for what, "Lucas asked also quietly.

"For hitting you and screaming mean things, "I said and looked up at him slightly. 

"It's okay, you didn't hurt me, "Lucas said and smiled down at me.

Everyone slowly returned to their dorm and doing what they were doing before I had my outburst. 

Lucas shut the door to the dream dorm and picked me up and walked us down the hall to the WayV dorm. My legs wrapped around his muscular body and my face buried in his neck. 

"Kun, I come bearing your child," Lucas said as he threw the door open. 

Kun ran to us and grabbed me out of Lucas's arms and whipped my tears away. He pulled me into the living room as Lucas followed behind us and hugged me as we watched Moomin, his idea not mine.