chapter 1

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"you're so fucking selfish" she continued yelling to me. i swear she got louder everytime she spoke. we'd been fighting since 9am, and it was now almost 1pm. she never seemed to quit.

"babe. please calm down. you're starting to scare me." i quietly said. i really hope she doesn't yell at me. she looked at me and stormed out the door, leaving the swinging screen door open. jesus fucking christ.

i went to the back room and grabbed my controller to my led lights, switching them to purple. i really just needed to be alone right now.

i grabbed my laptop and went to soundcloud, and started playing my "feels bad" playlist. mainly filled with just sappy songs. i don't know why i'm feeling so sad right now, usually i'm angry when we fight.

"katherine, why did you leave the fucking screen door open again?" fuck. it was my dad.

"it was madison, i'm sorry." i could see the rage on his face as soon as i said her name.

"what do u mean i was madison? i told you she wasn't welcome here. not after she did that shit" he said, pointing to my neck, which had a pretty large hickey. i told her not to do that.

"okay okay, i'm sorry. i promise it won't happen again. i really don't think she'll be back anyways. i can't put up with her anymore." i say, almost forming tears. he just walked away and scoffed. damn. so everybody just walks away from my feelings.

i walk back to my room, noticing a song playing that wasn't really familiar to me. i checked what playlist was playing and all it said was "suggested track," so i'm guessing i had already played the entire "feels bad" playlist.

the song was pretty good honestly. the production was also good and it sounded professional. and the girls voice, oh my god was it amazing. i checked the artist, ocean eyes, billie eilish.

i'd never heard of her before. she had two other songs that i'd seen. fingers crossed, and sHE'S brOKen. i chuckled at the second one. it was a silly wordplay on "she's broken and he's okay." pretty sure she got that from tumblr. that's kinda cute.

i decided i'd listen to those two later, since she was obviously talented. but, for now i added ocean eyes to my "new tunes" playlist and closed my laptop. i took my phone out of my pocket, and scrolled through instagram.

*incoming call from madison💖*
ugh. not who i wanna talk to right now.

"hey babe!" she said as soon as i answered. she sounded drunk. and, she probably was. jesus. it's barely 4pm.

"hi madison." i said back, definitely unamused.
she continued to babble for thirty minutes about being sorry and about how we need to "hang out" tonight so she can apologize in person. that always ends up being sex.

"anyways i think i'm gonna leave soon, i'll be at ur house in-" i cut her off. "madison, i think we need to call things off."

i could hear the crack in her voice. it was always her breaking up with me.

"what? you can't do that. i know ur kidding. i'll be there soon." she laughed. trying to play it off because she knew she was gonna cry. i know her too well.

"no i'm not kidding madison. don't come over. my dad's home anyways, he won't let you in." i said, then hung up. i set my phone down and went to shower. grabbing my laptop and bluetooth speaker. i wanted to listen to that billie girl some more.

ahhh okay hi, this is the first chapter of the book:') i'm sorry this isn't very interesting yet, it's kinda just fluff and some backstory before i get into everything else that i'm planning to write but i'm hoping you stay and read the rest because i swear it's more interesting than this<3

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