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The night was, perfect. I mean yes there was some drama but welcome to family events. No matter how much money or how 'famous' they are, there is always family drama. On the ride back to the hotel we all were in our phones getting ready to head out tomorrow.
"The weather looks horrible tomorrow night." Savannah said.
"Do you think our flight will get cancelled?"
"I hope not." I looked up at them. "I don't have the money to change my flight and I don't want to spend Christmas here. I want to be with my family." They looked back at me.
"I agree, I have my entire family in. This is the first time in 9 years!" Vanessa said.
"Wow!" I was happy that she got to spend Christmas with her entire family. "That's so great." She smiled.
"I know." I checked my bank account. I had $134.67 after my bills come out. I tapped my fingers on the back of my phone. Maybe the flight will be fine and we'll be able to leave. It didn't calm my nerves at all. I needed to text Pam.
(Me: Hey Pam. We're looking at the weather for tomorrow night, doesn't look that great. Are we bumping up our flight at all?)
(Pam: Hey sweetie! We have heard, unfortunately no. It's too much of an expense for the company, seeing as there is so many of you. If you can do it out of pocket, we are suggesting it.)
(Me: Okay, thanks.)
This didn't make me feel any better. It actually made me feel worse. What if the flight gets cancelled and I'm the only one stuck here? What am I going to do?
(Pam: How was the ball?)
(Me: Beautiful and wonderful. I think I could have stayed forever. The castle is stunning!)
(Pam: And Prince William?)
(Me: He's going to be the hardest part about leaving Baltaver.)
(Pam: Just remember, goodbye doesn't mean forever, it just means for now.)
(Me: I'll try to remember that.)
But it was for forever. I couldn't afford to ever do this again. I mean I can't even afford to stay in Baltaver or even bump my flight up and let's be honest, he's got more important things to do than chase down a dancer from California.

We got back to the hotel with a fairly silent car ride. It made me so uneasy. I just need to wash everything away, or try to at least. After I showered and blow dried my hair, I climbed into bed. The girls were all packing. My stuff was mostly in my bag, I was good about keeping everything together.
"Hey, we're changing our flights to the morning." Michelle sat down across from me on the bed. "We are doing it out of our own pockets." I huffed a little.
"I know, I just can't afford that."
"I know, we don't have enough money between the three of us either. It's $450 per person. We only have $200 between the three of us." I grabbed her hands.
"Don't worry about me, I'm sure I'll be fine." I tired to smile but my confidence wavered.
"Do you want the money for a hotel room?"
"Im going to be fine." I assured her but I didn't know if I believe that. I knew the weather for tomorrow night didn't look good but what else could I do? I couldn't afford to get a different flight and I know some other girls are in the same boat as me. Worst comes to worst we find a hotel room for all of us to share until we can leave. "What time is your flight tomorrow?"
"We leave at 11:30." I nodded. That'd put them landing in California at about midnight here and about 3pm at home. They'd still have the day left.
"I'd suggest you sleep on the plane." Michelle smiled.
"We'll be fine." I nodded. This is the first time wed ever be traveling without each other. It was a scary though, for me mostly. I had never traveled alone before.
"Okay, well I'm going to bed. I'm tired." Savannah crawled next to me and tucked herself in.
"Yeah. Me too." Michelle and Vanessa climbed into their bed and snuggled under the blankets.
"Goodnight." I said to everyone. The lights flicked off.
"Goodnight." Vanessa answered. I laid on my back and stared up. My eyes slowly adjusted so I could see the texture on the ceiling. I didn't want to cry but I couldn't help myself. I was scared and felt so alone.

All night I tossed and turned. I barley slept. My anxiety was just eating at me. At 6:30 I let myself get out of bed. I grabbed my hotel key and sweatshirt and made my way down stairs. The dinning hall wasn't open yet so I just sat on the floor and waited.
"Ma'am, it's not going to open for another 10 minutes." An employee told me. I shook my head a little.
"That's fine." I said softly. He sighed.
"I'm only doing this once, okay?" I gave him a strange look. He popped open the door and let me in.
"Thank you." I said softly. He nodded and closed the door behind me. The room was still dark but I knew where the coffee maker was. I could see the light and smell the warm beans. I poured some into a cup and sat down in front of it. Just clinging to the coffee, I thought about my flight today. I couldn't help but feel overwhelmed and sad. The door opened and close again. This time the light flicked on. The employee who let me in was standing in the door way.
"Are you okay?" I nodded a little.
"Just a rough nights sleep, that's all." He stuck out his hand to me. I grabbed it and he pulled me to my feet.
"Sit down Miss," he paused.
"Miss Autumn, I will get you whatever you like for breakfast."
"You don't have to." He shook his head.
"Please, let me."
"I just eat eggs with cheese mixed in."
"I'm Theodore by the way, but you can call me Theo." He slide a bowl of eggs and cheese to me.
"Thank you Theo."
"My pleasure." He smiled. "How long are you here for?"
"I was here for 5 days, I leave this evening." I told him.
"Shame, I wish I would have meet you earlier." Was he flirting with me? It wasn't even 7 am and I looked like a disaster. I took another bite of my eggs.
"Too bad wishes don't come true." I answered. I wished my flight would be just fine and I'd be home for Christmas. He smiled and left. The doors behind me opened but didn't close again. My guess is it was 7 now. I ate my eggs mindlessly and stared at the coffee maker.
"Good morning Autumn." I didn't look back, I already knew who it was.
"Good morning Pam." She sat down next to me.
"Are you okay?"
"I didn't sleep well and I can't afford to bump up my flight so I'm just kind of stressed out, I guess." She grabbed my hand and squeezed.
"I'm sure it will be just fine." I nodded. I really hoped so.

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