twenty-three

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Even though I tried to believe in Trevor not being involved in the whole situation with Derek, I caught myself stealing glances at him at school on Monday. I just couldn't stop the quiet 'what if?' nagging at the back of my mind, continually growing louder with every passing minute that I didn't get any closer to the truth.

On one hand, I really wanted to be that someone that fully and undeniably believed in Asher's seemingly crazy schemes. On the other hand, I didn't.

Another glance at Trevor, and I suppressed a sigh, annoyed with myself. Why did I have such little self-control?

A sudden poke in my ribcage with a pencil tore my attention away from Trevor, and I turned back to Sam behind me with a surprised expression.

"Stop turning around," she hissed without looking up from her notebook. "You're distracting me."

"You could have just tapped my shoulder instead of stabbing me!" I hissed back in annoyance.

"Kiri, do you have anything to share with the class?"

I turned back around in an instant, my face growing pale as I noticed not only Mister Langley, but also half of my classmates staring at me.

"No," I replied and crossed my arms. "Sorry."

Langley tilted his head. "What was so important that it couldn't wait until after my lesson?"

I rolled my eyes as I could practically sense Sam's smirk behind me.

"Nothing. I said I'm sorry. Can't we just continue now?"

"I don't know, can we?" Langley replied. He was sitting on the teacher's desk, his feet tangling lazily as he laid his book down beside him.

"Yuh. I give you the green light. Go on with your lesson, Mister teacher." Annoyance was turning to exasperation in my veins, and I fought the sudden urge to just jump up and leave the room without another word.

"Mister teacher," a girl from the other end of the classroom repeated. "That sounds so lame."

"No, you know what actually sounds lame? Your parents when they shout at me after they find out you all failed my class," Langley said, his voice suddenly turning strict and firm. "So, no more talking, no more commenting on anything that is said in this room. Just sit there and listen until that goddamn bell rings."

The atmosphere in the classroom had turned cold, and nobody dared to even cough twice as Langley continued his lesson. Since he was usually so chill and relaxed, I often forgot about this authoritarian side of his.

Once school was over for today, I was glad to finally hurry home. I was exhausted, both physically and mentally from all this thinking I was doing recently, and I wanted nothing more than to go back to the comfort I had once felt. Back at my real home, with Ruby, and Mom and Eliot, too. Shit, if he had never fucked that student none of this would have ever happened.

The worst of all this was that I couldn't just not care about Trevor since that would only hurt Asher more. I liked him, there was no denying in that, and without him and his friends, my time here would have certainly sucked a lot more.

So, I was either with him, shared his conspiracy theories and maybe even tried to help him with his situation, or I chose to be adamant with my ignorance and just brush everything concerning Trevor off.

Shit, how could I even think about that? That would be denying Trevor's guilt, and like I had already said, it would only hurt Asher more than Trevor's presence already did.

I was only trying to ignore the obvious now. I didn't know when I made the decision, but I couldn't do anything else than be on Asher's side. I didn't want to. And I didn't have to.

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