Chapter 44 - I don't know.

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4 weeks.

She was 4 weeks pregnant.

Thinking of the time, I realise she would have fell pregnant when we got back from Hamilton island.

I was so sure I was using a condom.

"Are you sure you're okay with all of this?" Victoria interrupts.

I look down at her worried face and I bite my lip as I pull her closer.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"You look really preoccupied." She says quietly.

"You're pregnant Victoria, I still can't quite get over it."

Victoria smiles timidly but it falls away. "This is a big change but it'll be a good change."

I look down and sigh quietly. "I'm worried."

I frown. About having a child, or nurturing a child? The question is immediately pushed away when Victoria questions why.

She wants to understand my indifference, I know that, but how am I suppose to explain to her when I can't even understand it myself.

I want one, but I don't. Either way, she'll still have it and I'm in on the ride.

"It's hard to explain." I murmur as I lay down.

"Try to explain. I want to understand." Victoria questions, her hand laid on my chest and her chin is resting over top of it. "I've thrown a curve ball at you and I'm sorry. Both times were unintentional. Maybe we were suppose to have a baby."

Unintentional.

If we were meant to have a baby, why do I feel like I'm not ready.

"Maybe." I shrug and cup her face. "Nine more months. Until then, I'm going to he as selfish as I want and have you to myself."

Victoria smiles, excitement I've seen before clearly radiating in her beautiful eyes. "What do you think everyone is going to say?!"

I widen my gaze as I look up at the ceiling. What the fuck is everyone going to say?

I can just imagine Trisha telling me how fast everything is happening.

I shake my head. "I don't know."

Victoria blinks up at me when I finally look down at her.

"You were really funny last night." Victoria murmurs.

"Fozzeh fozzeh." She mocks and I frown.

"What?"

"You were really drunk." She chuckles.

"Was I?" I blink.

Well if I do remember, my head was fucking pounding this morning.

"Yeah, you were. You were so cute." She smiles and looks down at the tv.

I'm not paying any attention to the tv.

"I have plenty of words to describe me and cute is not one of them."

"Softie is one." Victoria smirks when I look down at her.

"Definitely not."

"Yes, definitely yes."

I poke her ribs then her cheek as she smiles. "I love your cheeks. I hope our baby gets your cheeks." I murmur.

Victoria gapes at me as if she can't comprehend what I've just said. I can't even comprehend what I've just said and it feels like it wasn't even my voice.

Frost bite - Z.M (Book 3, Cold trilogy)Where stories live. Discover now