016; real life

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"You...okay, let me...a week ago you finally admitted that you don't trust that he won't hurt you," Elijah starts off, looking at Thea like she's crazy, "and now you're moving in with him?  Is that even something you're ready for?  Is he ready for that?  Is this something you two are gonna really be okay with?  It can't be a spur of the moment decision.  You can't make this decision without thinking it through.  If you just jump right in and something goes wrong again, there might not be any going back next time."

"I know," Thea replies before pausing briefly.  "I have thought it through.  It might not seem like it but I've been thinking about how this would work since the moment I found out I'm pregnant.  I figured that, if he wanted to be involved, it'd be easier on both of us if we were on good enough terms to live together.  We don't even have to be together but if we're gonna parent together, it'd be easier at the beginning at least to live together, especially since there are going to be two babies."

"Do you still want to actually be with him or has that changed?" Elijah inquires, latching onto Thea's point about not being with Awsten.

"I want to," she's quick to answer before adding onto it, "I love him a lot, I really do but...how am I supposed to know when I'm, y'know, ready?  Or if he's ready?  I mean...I don't know.  I want to try with him, I just don't know how."

"I'm pretty sure he's told you a dozen times already that he's ready to try whenever you trust him," he reminds her, "do you?"


"Oh my god, Geoff, no," Awsten groans in frustration, "you don't need to fly out here!  She's not even halfway through the pregnancy yet, I swear, you're worse than my parents were when I told them—and they definitely had some words for me."

"Well, sorry if I'm overreacting but it's not every day one of my best friends calls me and tells me he's gonna be a dad!  To twins," Geoff shoots back, "how are you handling it?  And are things with Thea okay?"

"I think I'm handling it okay, better than I expected, at least.  As for Thea...things are complicated?  Not in a bad way, well, sorta bad, I guess but we're making progress," Awsten starts off before explaining a little better.  "I want to be with her so fucking bad but I've gotta wait it out 'til I earn her trust back.  I don't know how long that's gonna take.  A lot of the time it seems like we're just...right there, right on the edge of finally making it and then she just looks at me differently and I can tell she's thinking about that day again, thinking of me as the person from that day who hurt her and could do it again.  I don't blame her for that, of course, but it fuckin' sucks.  I know I put myself there but...guess I just never thought there'd be consequences.  Didn't think I'd ever see her again.  And then there's Elijah...I know he's just looking out for her but I can tell he doesn't trust me at all and that hurts even though I know I had it coming."

"Yeah, you did," Geoff agrees, "but you're trying to make up for it and she knows that.  Just give her time."

"I am giving her time.  I'm just scared that all this time is gonna lead to her not even wanting to be together in the end...and, I mean, yeah that would be her decision and I'd just have to deal with it but I don't wanna spend all this time trying to win her back just to have her say it—I wasn't enough.  I don't know how I'd handle that," Awsten tells him in frustration.  "And not to mention, whether we end up together or not, we're gonna have two babies to take care of and we both have fanbases that fucking hate each other for some reason!  Once they find out we have kids together?  They're gonna lose their damn minds!  And, the twins at least won't have to see that shit any time soon 'cause, y'know, they're babies but Thea's gonna have to see it and deal with it and then there will be a day eventually we won't be able to hide stuff like that from the twins and...I don't know.  I don't want any of them to get hurt but it seems inevitable."

"What about you?" Geoff brings up, catching Awsten off guard.

"What about me?" Awsten asks back, frowning in confusion.

"You already covered how you're worried about Thea and the twins," Geoff points out, "didn't mention how you'd feel about people being horrible to you and your family."

"I'll be fine," Awsten dismisses with a shrug, "I'm not worried about me.  People haven't shut up since that shit with Emily got leaked.  This'll just be another thing they talk about.  I'm over it."

"You're lying," Geoff calls him out on it, "you don't have to have this talk with me but you should consider bringing it up with your therapist, and probably Thea too."

"Already did.  Kinda, a little.  Before finding out it's twins I touched on this subject a little with my therapist.  Not sure how to talk about it with Thea yet...I'll figure it out though.  Not like I have much of a choice, gotta figure shit out before the twins are born," he says before pausing briefly, "and we'll have plenty of time to talk 'cause we'll be living together."

"You'll be what?" Geoff doesn't take it nearly as casually as Awsten had hoped for.  "That's...are you sure that's something you're ready for?  And is she ready for that?  I mean, with the way things are between you two...don't want anything getting mixed up while y'all are still at a place where you're not completely sure where you're gonna end up with each other."

"I know my boundaries," Awsten assures him, "I'm not pushing on anything."

"I know you wouldn't do anything but...living together is a real' big step.  Are you sure this is the right thing for right now?"


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