Chapter 146 - Dear Jani.

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You were surprised. Nikki was bitching about Jani even when he was on his deathbed. And now he wanted to apologise. You didn't realise how much Nikki had grown as a person, how much he had grown into his feelings. He had really changed.

Nikki had hoped that you had made a decision whilst he was on tour. That the first thing you were gonna tell him when he came back was that you had made a decision. He was confused. You would be lying there with him, acting like you were together and then you would make all these insecure comments about him and who his next girlfriend might be. He needed to make you realise that you couldn't have your cake and eat it too. That you needed to tell him, he was tired of living in limbo.

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Nikki had a press conference the afternoon of the show. He had to get from one side of LA to the other to make it in time. But he told you he wouldn't miss it, it was the first live performance of Izzy's he was gonna get to see.

Soundcheck went great. Izzy sounded incredible as did Lita. You felt naked without your guitar, you were just singing. The guitar was normally a distraction, but not today. Not with Lita playing Rhythm and Izzy playing Lead.

"Is Dad gonna make it in time?" Izzy asked as she swallowed hard. "I don't understand why they are letting a 12 year old play."

"Because you are amazing. Stop it. Gunners here to support you too." You said as you looked at Gunner sweet talking the woman behind the bar. You rolled your eyes as you headed over.

"He's 17" You mentioned and the woman widened her eyes and quickly excused herself.

"That's not cool" Gunner laughed as he turned to you. "I was trying to get a beer."

"Well stop flirting with older women and I'll buy you a beer" You said laughing when he looked st you shocked.

"Are you being serious?" Gunner asked and you nodded.

"Just one, and only if it means you'll stop going round pretending to be 21. Enjoy being a teenager for a while." You said and he nodded.

"You are way too cool to be with my dad" Gunner mentioned as he took out his phone, messaging his friends.

"He's a cool guy. He's just trying to keep you from following in his footsteps, quite rightfully so." You mentioned.

"Don't worry I'm not about to start shooting up." Gunner sniggered.

You walked around and integrated with the other performers, some you knew, some you didn't. You showed off Izzy like a trophy you had won. You were such a proud parent.

The show started and there was still no sign of Nikki. You were sat at the front of the show, looking back at the bar at Gunner but he shrugged, he wasn't there.

You wouldn't have cared if it was just you. But it was Izzy, he couldn't break his promise to her. You had a few songs to watch before you were on anyway.

Nikki stood looking over Jani's headstone. He was buried not too far from the show. He had felt such tremendous guilt for trying to pull you away from saying goodbye. If you had agreed to come back, you would have never been able to say goodbye. Nikki knew you would never be able to forgive him for something like that.

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