The Good Girl Plays the PLAYER

Chapter 22

It's been about a month since the breakup, I cry a little less, I try my best not to think about him as much and I keep myself busy as much as I can, I even took on a part-time job over the weekends in a fast-food restaurant to accomplish this and it seems to work, at least for now. At school is the hardest, seeing him everyday from across the hall or when in the cafeteria, flirting with girls like he used to, making out with them before my eyes and watching him being this way is torture for me, but I don't brake down, I don't allow anyone to notice how it hurts me, especially him. I put on a brave face and get on with my daily life, but inside it's killing me.

From time to time, our eyes lock, causing that familiar butterfly sensation within me, but it soon fades away when his expression changes into a glare. He hates me that much is clear, he makes a point of reminding me everyday. When he walks past me, he bumps into me on purpose, nearly knocking me over, trips me up and quite a few times I stacked it, falling flat on my face. He makes snide comments amongst his friends including my brothers, who by the way hate me too since the party, and then laugh. All of that I can pretty much tolerate, but when I see him flirting and kissing other girls right in front of me, that's when I'm on the verge of cracking, I hate it and I want to cry but can't afford to. I hold it in until I get home, locked in my room, covered by the duvet and that's when I release it all, screaming and crying into my cushion.

I'm starting to get used to it though, little by little, day by day, moving forward one step at a time, numbing out the pain and pushing it as far back as possible in my mind, but it's not easy especially when you are constantly faced with the person you love everyday. It's irrational I know, but I've fallen in love with him and I haven't got a clue why. I've become the pathetic looser I used to complain about, how does that even happen?

"Nicky, he's staring at you again!" Sydney says while breaking me away from my thoughts. "Just ignore him, he'll get tired soon enough" I reply, but the truth is, I'm tired and I have no idea how long this is going to carry on for. It's been a month and it only seems to get worse as each day goes by. "He's really got it in for you, he's making it so obvious that he's pissed. I guess being dumped for the first time in his entire life is just too much humiliation for him, shattering he's perfect image of being a player" she laughs and I try to hush her loud mouth by placing my hand over it. The last thing I need is her antagonising him and making things worse. "Shush, your too loud!" I whisper shout but she has none of it. She removes my hand and says:
"No I won't shush, he had it coming that arrogant prick and he has no right to be pissed at you anyway, he cheated on you remember?!"She says loudly and believe me, I remember every time I see his face. I turn my head to side-glance at him, who I can now see has clearly heard our conversation from across the cafeteria. He stands up leaving behind his swarm of bitches and he starts to walk over in our direction. I quickly look away in hopes that I'm mistaken and that he's not coming this way, but who am I kidding, he is definitely going to come here and cause a scene. "Oh look, he's coming!"Sydney says in a mocking tone, whereas I am dreading this. The cafeteria's humming sound of people talking suddenly quiets down, anticipating this interaction, wanting or expecting some kind of showdown, giving them more gossip material. I hear his footsteps as he approaches and finally come to a stop directly behind me. I stay seated, not moving an inch, wanting to just plainly ignore him, pretend I haven't noticed his presence but again, who am I kidding in a situation like this, it's practically impossible.

"Bitch number one, and stuck up bitch number two, if you have something to say, say it to my face, I'm right here!"Liam shouts aggressively, waving his hand around and I say nothing, whereas Sydney sits back comfortably in her chair crossing her long legs over, stares him up and down, then smiles, a wide cocky smile. "Sure no problem, I was just saying to my best friend over here that you are a surprisingly pathetic looser"Oh god Sydney, I've always loved your feisty side, but not today. Fuck this is going to end in disaster.