Chapter 58

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I feel Chase's eyes glance over me as he pushes me on to his bed. He begins to kiss me and I kiss back and it gets more heated by the minute. I feel him kiss down my neck and to my chest unzipping my jacket and then pulling off my tank top. He looks up at me and pulls me into another deep kiss pulling me closer, "fuck..." he says against my lips as he begins grinding against me. Next thing I know we're naked and he pushes into me and begins to fuck me, "mm Lana..." he mumbles, "lana, lana, wake up" I hear my name being called more and open my eyes to see Abel next to me, "w-what?" I mumble out confused, "Lana you were mumbling in your sleep are you okay?" He asked me. My heart was still beating quickly and I glance around the room to make sure I knew where I was, "Car?" He says confused pulling me close to him, "a-Abel?" I say shakily. He nods and I look down at the bedsheets then back up at him, "I need a cigarette." I mumbled getting out of bed and grabbing my purse going to the balcony and lighting one up. Why would I dream about that, I wouldn't cheat on Abel would I? Fuck why am I so stupid. I feel arms around me causing me to jump, "baby what happened?" Abel asked me kissing my cheek, "I-I don't know, i-it was a nightmare..." I mumbled putting my face in my hands and turning into Abel's chest resting my head, "it's okay babygirl..." he mumbles kissing my forehead. I look at him sadly, I felt so guilty. I love Abel and I wouldn't cheat on him with Chase. I wouldn't. "What happened last night Lizzy?" He asked me. The way he said my name breaking my heart a little more, "Lamar told me you had a few drinks, I guess you got drunk and passed out." I tell him, "I was talking to my friend and you passed out in front of us, he helped me bring you in here and then he left with everyone else." "I'm sorry babe..." he mumbled, "it's okay..." I say to him, "hey tonight we're gonna go out with my mom, Chuck and Sveta, is that okay with you?" I ask him. He nods and gives me a small smile, "of course Car." He says smiling at me, "I was jealous..." Abel mumbles, "what?" "I was jealous of you talking to that guy, what's his fucking name? Chase?" I sigh and look away from him, "baby I wouldn't cheat on you." I say to him, "you have." He mumbles looking away from me, "come on Abel that was a long time ago." "A year isn't a long time Lizzy." Abel says. I sigh looking at him, I wasn't sure what else to say. I pull him into a tight hug and begin to cry into his shoulder, "Abel..." I mumbled looking into his eyes, "I'm gonna go okay? I have to go talk to my managers." Abel says pulling away from me, "y-you're just gonna leave?" I ask him wiping away my tears, "I'm sorry Lana I've gotta go, I promise I'll be back by 8." He says to me. I sigh and nod, "Lizzy," I turn to him and he kisses me, "I love you." He says to me giving me a small smile, "I-I love you too..." "I'm sorry, I was being stupid." He says going to his clothes and pulling them on, "it's okay." I say as I begin to get dressed too. I grab my phone and call Chuck. She doesn't answer so I call Electra and she answers, "hello?" "Hey Marina you wanna go shopping? Abel's going to work and I wanna do something fun while I'm in New York." "Um sure, but only for a little while okay darling? I've got to record too." "Okay I'll see you in a bit, where do you want to meet?" "Dunkin doughnuts if it's alright, I'm bloody starving." I chuckled, "sure see you in a few." I finished getting ready and I go to the elevator with Abel, "so what are you up to?" Abel asks me as he presses the lobby button, "I'm going shopping with Marina." I say as I look through my purse to make sure I had what I needed, "you gonna get me anything?" Abel asks placing his hands on my waist with a small smirk, "maybe if you're a good boy..." I say smirking, "I'm an angel baby you know that." "Pfft yeah okay." I mumbled looking back to him. He pulls me into a kiss then pulls away as we hear the ding of the elevator the doors opening, "I'll see you tonight..." he mumbles. We walk out together but Abel turns right going towards the valet parking. I go outside and call for a cab and go to Dunkin. When I get there I sit outside and wait for Marina. A few minutes later I feel a pull on my arm and feel myself standing up and being dragged to the line, "hi to you too Electra." I say laughing. She laughs back, "Lana I'm so hungry you won't even believe it." "Did jack make you breakfast?" I ask him. She smiles and blushed slightly, "yes...but I'm a hungry bitch Lana." I giggle then look at the drink menu to see what I wanted. I decided on my usual and we finally get to the front of the line, "I'd like a dozen doughnuts, and an iced tea." Marina says, "Will that be all?" "No I'd like a coffee please." I say, "anything else?" "No that's it." Marina pays and we get our doughnuts, "I want at least 3 and one is for Abel." I say to her. She sighs and surrenders letting me have 3. I get my favorites and Abel's favorite and put them in a different bag and grab a straw for my coffee, "why do you have a straw?" Marina asks me confused. Instead of telling her I just push it into the lid opening to my coffee, "lana what the hell?" Marina says laughing slightly, "don't judge me dozen donuts." I say chuckling, "it's a little weird but I'm not I swear." Marina says giving me a small smile, "okay lets go eat." She says going back to the table I was sitting at. We sat and talked about our lives for a bit and Marina told me all the shit that happened while I was gone, "I missed my best friend..." she said sadly, "when Jack proposed I had no one to tell, no one I could even complain about him to. My family live in Greece and Wales and my sister is across the country, I miss you Lizzy." She says to me sadly, "I know honey I miss you too." I say, "I promise I'll try to come around more and now you can call me or whatever whenever you want." I say giving her a small smile, "thank you Lizzy." She says smiling, "of course." I say. "So what happened, about the kidnapping?" She asks me. I told her what happened, I told her everything. "Lana...t-that's so horrible oh my god." I nod slightly as I push a stray hair being my ear, "I-I know, but I'm fine now, really..." "lana no one should do this to you, have you seen someone about this? Like a therapist?" "No Marina, I'm fine." "Lana-" "I am. Change the subject." Marina looks at me sadly, "okay then...where do you wanna go shopping?" She asked me, "I don't know, everywhere to be honest, especially that music store down the street, I want to get some new records." I say to her. She nods, "I want to go to Guess later and maybe some other clothes stores but I guess that's it for now." She says. I nod and after we're done in Dunkin we go to guess. Marina starts trying on clothes and she comes out in a leather jacket, some jeans and adidas high tops, "do I look familiar?" She asks me. I chuckle, "um no?" "Are you kidding me? I'm dressed just like you." I laugh and stand up going next to her at the mirror, "no you're not! I look totally different!" I say. I stand next to Marina and look in the mirror. I was wearing the same sort of outfit. By the look on my face Marina laughs, "but there's a difference, I pull it off." I say with a smirk. Marina rolls her eyes and goes back into the changing room, "hey, are you Lana Del Rey?" I hear someone ask me. I turn and see a teenage boy, "yeah I am, can I do something for you?" I ask him. His eyes widen slightly and he holds out his phone, "can I take a picture with you?" He asks me shyly. I nod and take his phone from him and snap a picture as I kiss his cheek, "you want me to sign that for you too babe?" I ask him. He nods and I sign his phone and hand it back to him. He hugs me and as he does Marina comes out of the fitting room with some clothes on her arm, "Okay lana I'm ready to go- oh hi." She says to the boy. He seems even more surprised, "c-can I have a picture with both of you?" He asks. We nod and he takes the picture with us and Marina signs his phone. He hugs her too and thanks us leaving, "He was so sweet." I say to Marina, "yes I love the fans they're so cute." Marina says smiling as we head to the registers. Marina pays for her shit and I pay for mine which was only a dress and a jacket. We then leave the store and go to the next store and then to the music store. I look at the guitars and pianos and play them a bit as Marina browsed the records. I joined her a few minutes later and look at Lenard Cohen then the doors and Etta James and Nirvana. "Quite the taste you have there." A deep male voice said from behind me causing me to jump and bump into Marina, "Chase shit you scared me!" I say calming down a bit, "Lana are you Okay?" Marina asks me turning around to see Chase, "oh hi?" "Marina this is my friend Chase, Chase this is my best friend Marina." Marina smiles and shakes his hand, "hi nice to meet you." "Nice to meet you too." He says smiling at her, "are you a singer too?" He asks her, "yes actually you've probably heard of me, I was Electra Heart." She tells him, "oh yeah, your music is amazing." He says to her, "thank you." She says to him, "listen Lana I've got to go, it's been really nice seeing you Lana, and great to meet you Electra." He pulls me into a hug and kisses my cheek then leaves, "isn't he sweet?" I say to Marina, "yeah..." she says suspiciously, "what is it?" I ask her, "don't you think he looks like Francesco?" She asks me. I shake my head no and look at her confused, "definitely not. I don't think he looks anything like him." I say rolling my eyes slightly, "and I'm guessing you don't think he's flirting with you either?" Marina says to me, "oh he's definitely not, he knows he's just my friend and he knows I've got Abel." I tell her. "Mhm." Marina hums suspiciously. After a bit of silence I look to her, "Marina, I have to tell you something..." she turns to me, "what is it?" "You can't tell anyone okay?" She nods, "I had a dream last night I cheated on Abel with Chase..." I say to her quietly, "you didn't actually do anything right?" Marina asks me, "no I wouldn't do that to Abel." I say to her, "it's just a dream Lizzy, it could mean anything okay? Just relax and don't tell Chase or Abel about this okay?" I nod and she gives me a hug, "everything is gonna be okay Lana I promise." She says smiling. After a bit more of looking through records Marina and I had our picks, "let's get going, I've got to go to the studio it's almost 3." Marina says, "okay." We pay and leave, "do you need a ride back?" She asks me, "no I'm okay, just give me my bag." I say to her. She hands me my bag and I hug her goodbye and she leaves. I'm left alone and I try to get a cab only for it to ignore me. I roll my eyes but someone comes up next to me and waves one down for me, "need help?" Chase asks I smirk and walk towards the cab, "you wanna go for drinks?" He asked, "I don't know if I should I've got to go to dinner in a bit..." I say, "come on Lana, one won't kill you." I sigh and nod letting Chase get in the cab with me. We go back to my hotel and we go to my room so I could put my bags down, "you ready to go?" I ask Chase. He nods and we walk back to the elevator together. I feel Chase's hand on the small of my back and look over at him slightly but his expression doesn't change, but his hand does going lower and caressing my ass, "stop..." I mumbled to him. He sighs and moves his hand away from me, "I'm sorry..." he mumbles, "it's fine just don't do it again please." I say to him. We go back outside and to another taxi and we go to a bar Chase knows and I knew as well, "I used to come here to get high with my ex boyfriend." I say to Chase, "oh cool." He says as we go in. We order drinks and talk about our lives. As we're a few drinks in Chase tells me about his ex wife and their daughter and he tells me that she's a fan of my music. I tell him I'd love to meet her someday and he smiled and said he hopes we would soon. We talk and drink for a while longer until I look at the clock and see it's 7:48, "shit Chase I've got to go." I say to him, "what?! We just got here baby, you've got to go already," "I'm sorry I've got to go-" "let me at least walk you out..." he says giving me a small smile. I smirk and nod and he hails me a cab, "when will I see you again?" He asks, "I don't know, probably sometime after tour when I'm back in LA." I tell him, "I'll miss you." He says his eyes darkening. I nod and he kisses me. I push him away and leave. "Fuck." I curse to myself. I'm so fucking stupid. I get back to the hotel and it's 8:10. When I get to my room Abel's already waiting for me, "Lizzy we're going to be late." He complains, "yeah I know I'm so sorry baby." I say to him. I get changed quickly and we go downstairs and get into a cab. We go to the restaurant and on the way Abel tells me about his day. I tell him about mine and tell him about Chase and that he kissed me, "he kisses you?!" Abel says angrily, "I didn't kiss him back and I pushed him away quickly, baby I swear." I say to him, "Abel He was drunk." I say to him, "were you?" He asked me, "no. I'm buzzed." I say to him, "I promise Abel I didn't want him." I say to him. "I trust you. Please don't make me regret it..." He says sadly. I scooch next to him and hold his hand, "I promise Abel." I say to him giving him a small smile. We get to the restaurant and go to our table where Chuck and Sveta were sitting with my mom, "mom, Sveta this is my boyfriend Abel, Abel this is Chucks girlfriend Sveta, and my mom Pat." He shakes their hands and we all sit down. We all talk for a while and my mom tells stories about chuck and I when we we're younger Sveta and Abel laughing their asses off. After we start eating my mom asks Abel about his career and he tells her about it, then she does the same to Sveta. After a while when Abel was done I feel his hand on my thigh, "Lizzy." He mumbles, "what?" I say back looking towards him. He leans towards me and whispers, "you're mine, all mine, got it?" His hand goes down my thigh up my dress and he rubs me through my panties causing me to shiver, "yes I see." I say smirking at him. His fingers rub up and down against me gently before pulling away making me look at him with a glare causing him to smile. I sigh and we continue to talk after with my family. After dinner I say goodbye to everyone and Chuck pulls me aside, "Lizzy what do you think?" Chuck asks me pulling out a ring, "oh my god it's beautiful, is it for Sveta?" I ask her. She smiles and nods, "it's for her birthday, it's coming up soon so I wanted to get her something special." She says with a small smile, "that's so sweet." I say to her. She smiles and hugs me, "I know you have to go now, I see Abel wants you, good thing mom didn't though." I blush and say bye to her going to Abel, "can't wait to get you home." He mumbles. I smirk and kiss him quickly.

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