Landing back onto the ground of London again was an amazing feeling of excitement all over again. Even though I had Harry in the back of my mind this whole time, I was still excited to be back. I hadn't gotten a text from Harry, telling me that he would come to get me or even order a taxi for me, so I had walked from the airport and gotten into my own taxi that drove me all the way back to Harry's apartment.
I hoped, from the bottom of my heart that Harry was there, alive and well. I hadn't heard or seen him in so long and I missed him so much, so deep into my heart. The taxi drive couldn't be anymore longer than it should have been, it left me with my thoughts that I knew I shouldn't be having. Harry would be okay, safe and relaxed, probably in bed waiting for me. This had to be true, even when my mind is telling me otherwise.
In no time the taxi had me by the two large glass doors to enter the apartment. I scanned my card to enter and I dragged my two suitcases into the building. Everything was how it was when I left and it even looked better seeing it all again the second time around. I casually made my way through the lobby, smiling at the receptionist and giving her a small wave to which she waved back, and pulled my sore and tired body into the elevator. Each heartbeat would increase in speed as I made my way to the level Harry's apartment was on.
When the elevator had stopped, I strolled myself and my cases shortly down the hallway to then step in front of Harry's door and excitedly open it. I push it with my elbow, wishing to see some homecoming decorations or even to see Harry causally watching television but it was how I saw it last. Neat and tidy, a spill of coffee on the dining table, nothing dramatic has changed but the room did smell of rough liquor. Something Harry rarely ever drank.
'Harry?' my voice was hopeful when I called out to him, hoping to see him jump with joy. I nudged my cases to the side of the doorway and I slip off my shoes. I soon hear soft pats of feet on the hard wooden floors approaching me. I smile as I walk around the corner to see Harry making his way down the hallway.
'Hey.' I hum and go up to him to cup his face, kiss him and smother him in all the possible ways there are but I was stopped quickly when he gently pulled my arms away from his face. Confused, I search his face now looking into him. I hadn't noticed how drained and sore his skin looked until now and I furrowed my brows at him.
'What's the matter?' I ask him, chuckling softly trying to lift the spirit in the mood up a little. He smelt of rum or maybe that was whiskey. When he breathed out and shuddered slightly, barely keeping his eyesight in line with mine. I slip my hands with his and he instantly squeezes them. I was disappointed when the feeling I thought I'd have of euphoria and ecstasy was washed away when I touched him making the two of us seem uncomfortable to touch.
His lips close and rub together when he roughly moans out an inaudible swear. I lean in closer and notice the redness around his eyes, how puffy and bloodshot they were. I could suddenly tell something wasn't right and he was struggling to tell me.
'Is your family okay?' I gently ask, waiting for him to speak. He just gently nodded and squeezed his eyes hard together. When he had opened them, they swelled up with tears and he breathed out again, his chest shaking with fear.
'Harry, what is the matter?' I was starting to become fearful. He seemed so quiet and so dreaded to speak that it worried me more than it had feared him. He then jerks his head to the ceiling and slowly breaths in and out, then after he brings his eyesight to mine.
'I have fallen for you, each and every single day.' He stops speaking in that rough, monotone voice to take in a shuddering breath that had his hands shaking in mine. I gently smile at his words. 'And I have failed to properly tell you how much I never wanted you from my life.'
'I have failed to respect and love you for who you truly are and I failed to appreciate the love you have given me since, even though you've never said it.' he begins to shutter and drop some tears down his cheek. I release his hand and wipe them away with my thumb.
I was still in confusion, wondering why so suddenly he drops his heart like this and why he was so emotional about it. He gripped my wrist again and dropped my hand like I wasn't allowed to touch him and that just made me get frustrated with him. I didn't understand.
'I always wanted this to be special, something you'd look back forever on, something you could tell your children about and I have again, failed you.' he dropped his vision from my eyes and looked to the floor, again shuddering when he takes a breath. 'I didn't want to tell you this way, Anna.'
'Now I have to hope that when I do...you take it in consideration to forgive me...' he trails his sentence off, whispering now and he begins to cry, squeezing my hands in hopes I would understand what he is trying to communicate with me. I furrow my brows at him again and he fully understands my confusion.
'I love you.' it had warmed my heart hearing that but it wasn't warm for so long. 'I really do, deeply I do and I hope you can believe me when I say that I really...' he takes a breath, shuddering and squeezing my hands tightly, '...really do.'
'And please forgive me when I say this...'
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Sexaholic Roommate // h.sFanfiction
Anna was just your typical young-adult girl who had dreams to accomplish. She reached her Diploma and was offered a job to be the head Make-Up Artist in a high-end fashion and cosmetics brand... aka her dream. Harry was just your typical young-adult...