5 AM nostalgia and being besties with a roach

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hello friends, it's 4:48 in the morning and I have not slept at all, I know, very healthy. anyways I'm hiding in the bathroom because I have a friend over and I don't wanna wake him up and also I just got done taking a shower for whatever reason.

also before I got in the shower there was a roach on one of my bathroom cabinets bc i live in Florida and they are everywhere and I hate killing bugs but I'm also deathly terrified of them so I sad there for like thirty seconds with a shampoo bottle in my hand deciding whether or not to smush it but I couldn't because it's little wing was broken and I felt so bad and I don't like hurting animals even if they're slimy and gross and spread disease so I just slammed the cabinet really loud so it would go into one of the cabinets and it did but now I just got out and I'm only in a towel and I just saw it on the floor so I'm hiding on the toilet.

in other news does anyone ever feel like as soon as you get in the shower all hell breaks lose like I be tryna wash my hair and there be BANGING in the house like damn world war three didn't need to happen while I was tryna get clean.

also I'm feeling very nostalgic like you know when you just miss who you used to be so bad and you want to be that person again but you know you never will and you don't even know who that person really was or who you are now and it's just?? and like it kind of manifests I'm missing the people you were close to during that time and the stuff you liked and you sorta regress to your like 12 year old self and you just hold on to everything you used to love so tightly and you just feel sad and scared and too small for your body

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