I'd love to say that I was Neutral Good. To say that I would do anything to protect what I believed was right. It would be something to take pride in.
I dream of falling under Chaotic. Chaotic anything, Good, Neutral, even Evil. What fun that would be. Such a dream fills my waking hours and haunts me with regrets.
I know I am not Evil. When I find myself condemning evil deeds, I know. I could never be that person.
Instead I think I am Lawful Neutral. It is not a good place, I think. Worse than being Evil. Blindly following the laws, good or bad. Perhaps I have some morals to redeem me. But not enough to go out of my way to help others. And certainly not enough to break laws to do so. And sometimes, I am rue to admit, I haven't enough energy to care. It is a frightening thing, I think, to be Lawful Neutral. But worse, I think, to see how many people are.
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Apathy: 1. Absence or suppression of passion, emotion, or excitement. 2. Lack of interest in or concern for things that others find moving or exciting. 3. Stoicism . Freedom from emotion of any kind.