Chapter Three: The January Excperiences
The first passage was written very neatly.
January 17, 1939
I have not seen the boy since that day. Needless to say I've been looking for him. He does not show up. And I have given up on looking for him. Mrs. Gregory was released from the hospital. I think this is terrible and probably was done by her husband paying enough money for him to get her out of this place and keep the nurses silent. She shouldn't be out in the real world, she should be under a nurses care. She will be back. I wonder if I shouldn't be out in the real world. And that's why the nun's have made me a nurse here. Except I have no loving parents or husband to bail me out of this horrible hospital, surronded by death.
January 20, 1939
I SAW HIM. I saw the boy he was standing outside the hospital smoking a ciggarette. He had just walked out of Mick O'Leary's smoke shop. I knew it was him, because nobody in the world could be as handsome and walk the same way he does. He is magical, the way he moves and leans. I want to meet him. And I do not want to meet him I'm afraid of him. But watching him is an escape out of this world. He makes me dream and wonder and think about who he could possibly be and what he does. He dresses like a gangster, like Al Capone. Al Capone currently a prisionar at Alcatraz. This hospital is like my own Alcatraz. I'm an isolated prisoner.
Alcatraz? That is intense. I thought to myself after reading these two passages. I
felt bad for her. I didn't know what it felt like to be trapped. I could imagine though.
And the description of alcatraz made it seem ten times more intense. I looked up at
the clock it was almost two AM but I didn't have school on tuesday because monday
tuesday and wednesday were our fall break.
January 21, 1939
Today I was sitting at the front desk and he came in. I felt my head beat fast as he walked up to the desk. He was handsome. His hair was curled up at the top, the typical way most of the boys wore their hair. In his other hand he was holding a fedora. He had it clenced in his hand. He stopped at the front desk and placed his hat on the desk. He smiled and began to sign his name in on the visitor list. "Excuse me sir. Are you looking for a patient." He smiled, only one side of his mouth curving up, he had a handsome crooked smile. I felt a bit weak looking at him. He was so good looking. He bit his bottom lip he un buttoned his suit jacket and reached in his pocket pulling out a letter. He told me the envolope was adressed from his father to the director of the hospital. I nodded and he handed me the envelope. He thanked me and started to walk out of the lobby. But before he could get out another young nurse ran up to him and hugged him. My heart sunk in my chest. My few days of escape were over.
January 24, 1939
Nothing much has happened here. Same thing that happens in a hospital. People die, people are diagnosed, people are born, people break their bones and hope to get them fixed. And nurses sit idly by doing what they can, and for those of us nurses who are here because it's either become a nun or a nurse because you have no parents who will give you a life, we just sit and wait until we ourseleves are checked in the hospital and wait to die. Sometimes when I close my eyes, I see my name, HELEN REEDS engraved on a headstone.
January 27, 1939
Mrs. Gregory is back. Who saw that coming?
That was the last passage in the Journal for January.
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