chapter 39 the promise

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The few days had passed in absolute misery, I spent the days watching movies and eating ice-cream with Simmi, cursing her ex while I daydreamed about my....what did I call him? Boyfriend ? Husband?

But even though she started to smile a little again, it felt like somehow she had faded a bit. The nights were the worst, Simmi would talk and mumble in her sleep and wake from nightmares and I missed Phillip terribly. It was stupid, he was only gone a few days but it was the first time we had been apart since we married.

Except when she noticed the big fat hickies on my neck, then the old Simmi was back, if only for a moment.

“ bitch you finally shagged him! “ she cried out when she saw them.

“No I did not!” I yelled at her and threw a pillow at her.

‘ whoa, that must have been one hell of a make out session. Did he go down on you? ” She smirked.

“ No! Eww!” I yelled back at her but as I blushed she smiled. “that good huh? Hun, I am no relationship Guru but you need to start lightening up with this guy, you like him a lot right? Well one thing about guys like him, he’s got money and power and plenty of both and if he’s not going to get it from HIS WIFE then he will find someone else to get it from..”

‘ Simmi you are disgusting!” the thought of Phillip paying a prostitute made my head spin. I had never thought of it.

“No I am not, geez, its bloody Indian society that’s disgusting, the bride is expected to be a bloody virgin on her wedding day but its ok if the guy has shagged half the town. Its like my fucking family, my brothers can bring home any kind of race of girl home and dads ok, me, I wanna bring home a white guy and its like the whole world has going to end. I’ve been walking on glass for weeks trying to think of how dad would react  and it was useless because in the end the stupid shit was cheating on me!”

I put my hands over my ears and pretended that I couldn’t hear the conversation anymore. It scared me, bringing up too many things that I didn’t want to deal with and my mind wandered back to the pack of pills my mum had given me, stashed at the back of my cupboard.

“ bitch, you know what I’m saying is true! Well if you are going to ignore me then pass me the rest of the ice-cream, I like this movie, the main guy dies a bloody death....”

She decided that she was ok to go home on Wednesday morning and promised to see me at university the next day, sober and drug free, and as I dropped her home I  hoped with all my heart that she would be ok.

Phillip had come home that afternoon and found me in sitting on the little chair under the willow tree, music blasting loud on my earphones and tears streaming down my face.

I had decided to drive Simmi back home and visit my parents on the way back, borrowing a white sports car. I needed to talk to them and didn’t want Stanford waiting around. I had been making suggestions to them over the phone over the past few weeks on how to increase bookings at the hotel, so they could start paying off this loan that was like a lead weight I was carrying around but the wouldn’t hear a word of it and I hoped that if I talked to them face to face they would see reason.

But they didn’t and instead of listening to me, hearing me out and taking my suggestions, they just shrugged it off and told me to be quiet and each lunch and that my brother would sort thing out when he got back home, my brother , who wasn’t the slightest bit interested in the hotel. I had never felt so demeaned, so dejected and rejected.

I had looked at their bank accounts and had seen the cash flow, if things didn’t pick up at the hotel soon there was no way that they would be able to pay off this loan and they would lose the hotel.

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