"I'm not gay." Reid whispered to himself and kicked the sheets off himself.
He rolled around kicking at air needing a confirmation that he was, in fact, straight. He sat up and muttered the same thing again. I'm not gay, he thought to himself. It's not like he had dreams of kissing Taylor, he just liked the boy's company. He seemed interesting.
"I'm not gay!" He screamed.
"Okay, champ, you're not gay!" His father shouted back from downstairs, "It's five in the morning. Shut up."
Reid sighed. Out of all the things he knew he was going to experience during his teens, sexuality crisis wasn't one of them. Reid had always had eyes for girls. He had never ever looked at boys in a sexual or romantic way. He still didn't so why was he worried? Why was this haunting him all of a sudden? Maybe, it was the way Oliver raised his eyebrow when Reid had told him that he had been hanging out with Taylor Meriss and Simon had gone the geeky guy? As though Simon wasn't a geek himself but Simon hadn't said it judgmentally so that was fine. Fuck Oliver and his eyebrows of skepticism. Well, that's gay, a part of him shuddered because Oliver? Ew.
It wasn't a sudden confusion; it had been creeping in his mind for the past few weeks since his first meeting with Taylor. He had talked with Taylor everyday since then, texting when they couldn't meet, sending each other memes and all that. But then, Simon had pointed out that he was smiling and asked him if he had gotten Luna's number which just made his smile slide right off. Because, oh crap. But who said you couldn't smile when you were texting your friends?
He kept denying the fact that it wasn't just friendly, the way he was behaving with Taylor. Walking him home all the time, buying him coffee even when he didn't need to, searching for songs that Taylor would like. It was such a waste of time but the way Taylor's eyes lit up made it all seem worth it. But then again, he wasn't gay. He was 100% straight even though no one could be hundred percent straight. He had himself said he'd turn gay for Channing Tatum at one point in his life.
When he came down to breakfast, his parents cast him a concerned side glances.
"Reid, honey." His mom began and he knew where this was headed, "Was this why you misbehaved? Because you were confused about your sexuality and didn't know where to channel the confusion?"
His dad silently laughed behind his newspaper and the way the newspaper shook was a testament to how much his dad was enjoying this. His dad wasn't that naive. He knew that he hadn't been- well, he wasn't gay. Reid scowled at his mother who took his hands and smiled at him.
"Baby, you're our son. We love you no matter what." She nudged her husband, "Daniel, tell him."
His dad slowly lowered his newspaper, red in the cheeks; he had clearly been laughing a lot.
"Yes, Reid. It won't change how much we love you." His dad coughed trying to get his laughter under control as his mother shot a disapproving glance at her husband.
"Mom, I'm not gay." Reid said.
"Oh, but it still stands. We love you."
Reid didn't respond choosing to stay silent for the fear of making it worse. When his mom had moved away, his dad leaned in and whispered.
"If you didn't want your mother to know, then you shouldn't have screamed "I'm not gay" for no reason."
"Dad, I'm really not gay."
"Okay." His father said a little too nonchalantly.
"I mean it."
"I said okay." His dad repeated. Reid waited and then his father suddenly burst out, "Actually, I thought you were in relationship with your best friend."
"Who? Oliver? Simon?"
"Yes." His father replied.
"I said what I had to. Now, if you'll excuse me."
When he went to work his mind was full of thoughts of Luna, Taylor and his confusion regarding his sexuality. Just one boy and now he was suddenly gay? Bi? No, he needed to think this through. It'd take him years to get this straight. He knew that he couldn't confirm his sexuality within hours or days so he thought of ignoring it until it got solved. Great.
But the thing was he couldn't ignore it no matter what he did. He sighed, kept sighing and Xena looked at him annoyed. Connie seemed concerned. They knew he was on an edge so no one talked to him. They didn't try to approach him which he was thankful for. But that didn't last long.
"I'm not gay." He snapped at Connie while Xena watched him amused and annoyed.
"Whoa, Reid, who called you gay? Who ruined your fragile idea of sexuality?" Connie rarely ever talked this snarky, "Shut up, being gay isn't the worst thing. I might punch you if you act this way."
Reid took a deep breath. He wanted to explain to her that he wasn't worried about being gay, he was just highly panicky and confused about possibly being attracted to a guy who he had met a few weeks back.
"Sorry, Connie. I didn't mean that."
"What happened?" Xena asked.
"I crashed into this guy and he's just so cute and I wanted to apologize but then I caught him coffee and shit happened and before I know it, we're talking- like all the damn time. He is a really good guy and handsome. My friends were like who you textin' bro? and they were teasing me about it. Now my parents think I'm gay and my dad thinks I'm in a gay threeway relationship with my best friends."
Reid pants having speed talked and Connie motions him to take deep breaths Xena just looks confused as hell.
"Damn, Connie, did you get any of that?"
"Something about a cute guy, Reid being gay and threeway relationship."
Xena grinned as Reid sighed.
"You caught all the important points, Con."
Xena moved away when a customer entered and Connie looked at Reid curiously.
"So, you met a cute guy and now you're confused?" Connie asks and Reid nods.
"That's normal, Reid." She shrugs, "Sometimes you can be straight and have crush on the opposite gender. Like this one person you're attracted to for no reason. Lot of straight guys have that experience but if you like not just one guy and have had attractions to more guys, you light need to reconsider. Gay isn't the only sexuality, you know?"
Reid nodded slowly, still breathless and he vowed that there was some obsessed googling tonight. He needed to be less confused and panicky. When he was confused, Reid became a ticking time bomb. You couldn't say when he would burst out. So, he had to try and minimise his confusion if not totally stop being confused. For that, first he had to accept that he might not be straight. Learning acceptance was the first thing towards being happy.
Ayy, that's a blatant reference to one of my favourite books on the planet by _Vitecro_ check it out y'all
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Reid Cathwell's Splendid Summer Of Crisis ✔Random
#1 in the Splendid Summer Series The Summer of '17 was supposed to be glorious full of pool parties, girls and awesomeness. At least that's what Reid Cathwell envisioned it would be like but just his luck, he's stuck volunteering at pet shop all be...