13th May 2019 All Rights Reserved
I was ten when I saw my father drinking for the very first time. It was more than just drinking. He was drunk.
At least that was what Mumma called it.
" You are pathetic getting drunk like this. Why can't you get over it. The brat doesn't want to know you. You keep sending letters and they keep coming back returned rejected. She is not worth it." Mumma snarled with a screwed up face as she was speaking to Daddy.
Mumma was always speaking to Daddy like he was always doing something wrong. But I never saw him doing it. Whatever it was she was mad at him about.
But I wondered who the brat was Mumma was talking about.
" She is worth it. She was always worth it. I would have still had my family but for you spreading your legs the first chance you got like the slut you are." Daddy slurred his words at her. But I heard them and so did Mumma.
Mumma lifted her hand and slapped him right across his face. Daddy fell back against his desk and lsid right off and onto the floor.
" Don't you ever call me that again." Mumma yelled at daddy. She looked really mean as she leaned down and screamed into his face as he lay there like that.
" It's true. You are a slut. You couldn't get your pants off quick enough for the fucking you wanted from me. Or from anyone for that matter. So, if I want to call you a slut, I damn well will." Daddy began yelling at Mumma who backed away from him and held a hand to her heart as if Daddy shot her right through her chest.
" I should have killed that brat when I had the chance." Mumma whispered. But not that quietly either. I still heard her as I hid behind the curtains.
" Then I am glad she is no longer around us then. But she will always be my oldest child. And nothing you ever do will change it. Your daughters will always come second to Doreene. Always." Daddy was spitting as he sneered at my mother.
" You bastard." Mother whispered to him. I can see her beginning to cry with the tears running down her cheeks. I nearly raced out from behind the curtains to hug her. But she might hit me like she normally does.
I tried to see what was happening then. But I think mother had left the room. I think I heard her footsteps slowly and quietly leave the room and I waited a couple of minutes before sticking my head out again and look around at daddy who was still sitting on the floor crying.
My daddy was crying and mumbling. I didn't like that, not at all.
" Daddy?" I asked him as I slowly approached. But I guess he didn't hear me. He was holding a picture in his hand and looking at it in his hand while still crying.
" Daddy? Daddy? It's alright, Daddy." I said as I began to cry with him. I reached out and touched his shoulder and he jerked when he realized that I was there.
He angrily wiped at his face as he tried to get to his feet.
" What are you doing here?" He asked me as he stumbled behind the desk and fell into his chair.
" I wanted to see you." I said to him a bit hesitantly. I haven't ever had him get really angry at me. And I don't really want him to. But I don't like this drinking he is doing. He acts funny and it makes my mother cry and yell. But Daddy still just looked at that photo in his hand.
I came around the side of his desk and stood next to him and looked down at the photo of him and another little girl. That little girl looked a bit like Daddy does. But she has different eyes.
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