"Hey!" his gruff voice called out, as he closed the door behind him.
"Hey!" You replied welcoming and softly.
Charles scans the dark room briefly. The tv was off, only one light was on, the curtains were closed and you were still awake. He wasn't expecting to see you up, at least those confused gloomy eyes told you that.
"It's really late...-uh why aren't you sleeping?"
You shrugged still in the couch looking at your outfit: long cotton colourful socks, cotton shorts, his hooded sweatshirt, no make up, absolutely nothing else. "I couldn't."
Not that you were lying. You haven't been able to lay down and precisely sleep. Yes you already knew he would always be late, you knew how much time he spent working with his team specially since he signed with Ferrari, you knew exactly what he was doing and that was the main reason you couldn't sleep. You wanted to guarantee that he was okay.
"It's really late." He peeked at his watched then looking up at you
He didn't move since he got in. He was still in your home shared doorway wearing the same shoes, the same clothes he wore that morning when he left, only now a Ferrari team jacket covering his arms, his hair covered in the dark beanie you brought him a few months during a vacation. It bothered you so much how it felt weird to look at him and not clearly recognize the Monegasque. He seemed stuck, changed, confused not the guy you were so madly in love with. You moved from your sitting position, dragging your body out of the couch, your socks sliding in the wooden floor of your living room. His knuckles turned white as he gripped he hem of his jacket, eyes closed, sucking his lower lip as he shook his head softly.
"No!" He gave a step back unable to look at you. "I can't, I don't...-"
"Charles, please come." You were sure he didn't want to talk about it, you didn't want to pressure him to talk about it at all. Matter factly you only wanted to make sure he knew and rembered you were there for him, you were his always and forever.
You could feel your heart skipping a beat when Charles finally opens his beautiful blue orbs, as you tugged the knitted beanie from his head a little breath of a sweet giggle slipped from you when your eyes watched his raven curls untameable standing up in all angles. Charles couldn't help but manage a small kind of smile of his own just barely as he watched attentively your face, how the tip of your nose wrinkled, how your eyes brightly changed colours when you smiled, but his reaction only assured you that he was purely weighted down.
"How about a shower?" You suggest nonchalantly trying not to force him. Charles only nodding slowly, his hand gently brushing your hip when he kissed your cheek. Then his hands were back on his side. That only made you nervous. Cause now should you grab his hand? Or just let it go.
Don't force it.
Yet you couldn't help it. And he didn't resist. He let you hold his hand while you two climbed the stairs, he watched how you carefully pull his coat, then his shirt over his head. He rested his heavy head in your shoulders inhaling your addictive and so well known perfume and you pulled his belt from the loops, Charles letting you out of his reach to tug his shoes, socks and finally remove his jeans while you reached to turn the shower on.
"Stay?" You looked up at him a bit confused yet flashing him an assuring smile, stroking a thumb over his lower lip with a smile. Charles looked tired. It looked like he was carrying an exhausting burden and it somehow scared the hell out of you. He looked like Charles Leclerc the Ferrari driver, but he also was your Charles, deep down inside that sea of foreign feelings that didn't belong to him, inside his own self, you were sure your Charles was lost.
"Oui!" You flashed him a small side smile and hopefully a look that would assure him that you loved and understood him better than anyone.
One of the worst things to you was watching the bubble machine himself looking like he did. Charles was pure joy and energy everywhere he was, he had that beautiful smile and bright aura wherever he went, but now as you watched him drag himself under the steamy stream of lukewarm water, as his skin turned slightly pink and flushed, his eyes closed, and the water streamed from his head tracking down his so oh toned back, his hips, until it went down the drain it felt weird. You were sure he wouldn't speak to you, you watched the races, you saw everything, you were there when he arrived home, sometimes you weren't awake, yet you thought about him, and all this madness he was going through and now looking at him, you knew he needed you more than ever.
"Thank you." He appeared quietly with a towel around his waist his voice raspy and soft with a hint of a smile on the corners of his lips.
"Did you eat?" You asked picking up his discarded clothes throwing them in the hamper, reaching for another towel following him behind to your room.
He sighed shaking his head."Not really." He watched as you tiptoed to cover his damp head with the towel on his hand." I wasn't hungry anyway." He continued. "Thank you love."
"Sure." You watched him go back to the bathroom, walking back just seconds later dressed in a new pair of dark sweatpants. He walked back to you as you smiled and pecked his lips, the Monegasque reciprocating with a much bigger urge, so many things said into a kiss, how much he wanted to make sure you were there, how much he loved and adored you, how much he needed you. He knew he had to remind that to himself. You closed your eyes even tighter when he brought you in for a hug, burying his face on the crock of your neck nuzzling your hair while his hands held you on the small of your back.
No matter how hard it was, you knew Charles knew how uncomfortable and bothered that situation made you. The house was completely opposite from life, well not that you minded, but you did - he loved his job, he really did and he was so good doing that, he had to do whatever it takes. You knew that but it didn't made you less worried.
"Hey..." Your shared bedroom was dark, the only lights illuminating it were the street lamps outside invading your windows, he sat on the edge of the bed watching you arrange the bed sheets you forgot to that morning."Thank you."
"Waiting... And being here and..."
"Always Charles." He looks up at you when your hands travel to caress his cheeks. "I will always be here."
"I love you... So much YN." The lights outside allowed you to watch his eyes glossing over with tears. He presses his face against your chest as you hold him in comfort and slightly gasping looking down at the man you love.
"I love you more Charles." You admitted feeling his arms tightly and safe tangled around your waist. He rolled you over him to the middle of the bed still clinging to you, until the world of sleep caught him, and you still watched him the whole night until you also slept. Just you and him.