“I hear the sound, echoes beneath
Angels and skylines meet
And I'm straining to reach
The light on the surface
Light on the other side”
She didn’t remember the sensation of being lifted or clumsily set down. She didn’t remember the feeling of his hands in her hair, searching the back of her head for the source of her bleeding. She didn’t remember his panicking or him pacing the room talking to himself. She was asleep and blissfully ignorant.
She did remember waking up in the pitch black, feeling his presence in the room with her. She remembered feeling scared, of the dark, of him. She remembered knowing that he knew she was awake, even though they could barely see.
He approached and she felt his hands on her. He seemed to be checking for injuries, but it felt too invasive all the same. She tried to swat him away, but it was like she was under water, there was too much resistance on her limbs. When his hand brushed her neck she froze in fear. Instead of doing what she thought he might, he just caressed the soft skin there, tangling his fingers in the long chain she wore.
He was saying something, but it sounded fuzzy and muffled in her ears, she was still under water.
“I’m so sorry. That wasn’t how I wanted tonight to go.”
She looked at him, but couldn’t move. She was sinking in the deep.
“You are so beautiful, even like this.”
She wanted to hit him in the face again. She could make out some swelling on the left side of his face, the skin a pallid color, ready to bruise.
“What is this necklace you wear? I’ve never seen you without it.”
He gently tugged on the chain until the full length of it came out of the top of her dress. She was so angry that she was actually able to bring her hand up from where it rested on the floor cushion. She tried to snatch it back from him, but he was already inspecting what dangled at the end.
“What is this?”
He said it in such an aggressive, accusing tone that she knew he knew exactly what it was.
She felt a sharp pain at the back of her neck where dull metal bit into her. Yigit had ripped the chain from her neck. She heard the ping of her engagement ring as it hit the hard floor, somewhere in the dark where she couldn’t see. She gasped in shock and outrage, but her body was already on overdrive from the pain in her head, so the added stress and pain of losing that most precious to her only made her weaker. She was too dizzy to do anything but shed a tear before the blackness took her again.
This time when she woke up there was more light in the room. He wasn’t in the room either, and for that she was grateful. In fact it was deadly quiet, the birds outside the only creatures making noise. She tried to get up, but her head felt heavier than before, so she settled with slowly turning it so she could at least survey the room. The bedroom looked much the same as it had yesterday when she peeked in, the only difference was the small trail of blood on the floor leading from the living room and her ring shining next to the cushion she rested on.
She focused all her strength into her fingertips. Her right hand shook as she spread her fingers out on the cold wood, searching for smooth metal. When she touched it, it felt like home. She was able to pick it up and bring her hand over her body, but she had to rest a moment before she was able to use her other hand to put the ring on. The chain she normally wore it on was nowhere to be seen, so the safest place for it was the ring finger on her right hand. It hadn’t been there for over a year, but she would be lying if she didn’t admit how right it felt nestled there. Once it was snug, her arms flopped back down to her sides, exhausted.
She could feel the ghosts of the darkness pulling her under again, but held them off long enough to smile faintly at the thought of seeing her dream again.
The moonstone ring glinted on her left hand, her silver wedding band next to it. The next minute it was covered in sand. Her son had tossed a whole shovel full right where she was trying to build a tower. Instead of scolding him she just giggled and made a face at him. He smiled gloriously back at her. He had a small gap between his two front teeth, just like his dad.
His father was on the other side of the sand castle she was trying to erect. He was still the most beautiful man she had ever seen, even with a few more crow’s feet and some streaks of gray in with the brown. Their third child was in his lap, helping him pack wet sand into a bucket. The dimples in her cheeks more pronounced when she was concentrating on something.
She heard some bickering and looked over to see that her son, her eldest child, was pestering his sister, her second child, about sharing space on the towel. The girl’s brown hair whipped in the wind, the exact color of her own, as she scolded her brother for making her lose her place in her book.. She called to them and they came over to join their little sister and father in the sand.
The children helped one another to build a sturdy structure. She met her husband’s eye above their creation. He still looked at her the same way, the way that gave her butterflies every single time. But there was something else in his expression this time. She furrowed her brow and looked closer. It felt like he was trying to communicate something to her.
I love you.
I will always protect you.
Stay with me.
When she woke the third time it was to a loud sound close by. If she wasn’t in so much pain she would maybe be scared. Her eyes closed, the light was too bright, but she could still hear. When she heard the same sound again, but closer still, she was grateful that everything sounded muffled to her ears. It surely would have been earsplitting, not to mention terrifying, otherwise.
The noise and the light and the pain became too much and she tried to grasp at sleep, and the sweet relief it would bring. She almost got there, back to her pleasant dreams, but someone pulled her up and out.
I am camping in the black hole of death, but I got a chapter posted! Yay!
YOU ARE READING
And if I only could, make a deal with God, and get him to swap our placesFanfiction
I was inspired to write this after seeing several comments on Twitter. I had a similar idea months ago that involved Fabri, and since he's no longer on the show I adapted it for current events. Inspo Playlist: My Own - Whitaker Lovely (with Khalid)...