Kiwi | Harry Styles

Forty

"Come on." I took her hand in mine as we walked up the stairs. "I can't believe you're gonna see the Stones without me!"

"Danny can probably get you a ticket, he knows the guy who runs the stadium or something. In fact, you should invite your Dad. That would be cool." She smiled as I backed her into the bedroom. "Hey, Styles?" She smirked, a smirk which told me she was about to tease me but I couldn't stop the "yeah?" that escaped my lips.

"You think you gotta keep me iced - you don't!

You think I'm gonna spend your cash - I won't!

Even if you were broke,

My love don't cost a thing."

"HA - HA! Hilarious! Now get that arse on the bed!" I chuckled as my palm connected with her perfect rear end. I'd missed that too.

-----

"Jessi?" I said quietly as I hugged her naked body closer to mine as we lay in bed.

"Mmm?" She hummed against my chest.

"I need to talk to you about something."

"Uh oh! That sounds ominous?" She lifted her head to look at me.

"I've been thinking about this a lot and it seems like the right time but I'm nervous about bringing it up because it could ruin everything, you know?"

"Sweetie, you can talk to me about anything, you know that right?" She reached her hand up and ran it through my hair, the thumping in my chest calming as she did so.

"I know but I don't want to upset anyone but Jeff has been looking into some stuff and I don't want it to get out or-"

"Harry, I swear I won't tell anyone." She looked at me incredulously.

"I know. That's not what I meant. I don't want it to get back to the guys before I've had a chance to speak to them."

"I already said I won't tell anyone, Harry?" She sighed.

"No, you don't understand."

"Of course, I don't because you haven't told me what's going on yet." She said softly, her fingers tracing over my jawline.

"I think the band should go on a break - I want to go on a break. There are other projects I want to try and they just aren't possible while I'm in the band, it's relentless. Years of our lives get booked up at a time and it hasn't felt right ever since Zayn left. I think some time off where we can all figure out who we are individually could be good for all of us. Time to just stop, you know? But what if they hate me?"

Jess softly kissed my lips before she spoke, "thank you for sharing that with me," She hugged me tight. "You really need to speak to the guys. I mean for all you know they might be feeling exactly the same as you. Honestly, I think it will upset Louis. I think you just have to prepare yourself for that but he could never hate you."

"Yeah, I guess so. I'll speak to everyone tomorrow." My heart was thumping in my chest again, my sweaty palms were gripping Jessi as tightly as they could.

"It'll be alright, Harry." Something about her voice made me feel like she was right, everything would be okay. We might argue and people might get upset but in the end we all loved each other and that's what mattered.

-----

Jessi

"Hmm..." Harry sighed.

"What's up?" I asked as I finished loading the dishwasher with our dinner plates.