Living Again~ Fourteen

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I paced around my bedroom. What was I going to do? I never even wanted to see the jerk's face again but I had to return him his phone and tell him to leave me alone. I looked out the window. He's going to be here any time now. I clenched my teeth and tried not to get emotional. The past two weeks had been by far the most fun I'd had after my parents died. And to find out that all that was for a freaking bet, it was crushing me.  

My head snapped up at the sound of the engine. He was here. I braced myself and went downstairs with his phone.

"Hey Marissa!" He greeted me with a wide grin. Watching his carefree smile I realised that I had really started to like Ethan. I loved talking to him and I loved the feel of his arms around me, he made me feel safe. He made me feel as if I wasn't alone. He was always eager to spend time with me, which made me feel wanted and loved. Since my parents death I've always felt like a burden. I didn't feel that way about myself when I was with him. As real and wonderful as these days may have been for me, for him they were just a negotiation for money.

"Ethan, you forgot your phone." I said quietly, handing it to him. I avoided looking at his face.

"Oh yeah, I know. Thanks, so are you ready to go to the mall yet? We've got shopping to-"

I cut him off, "Leave."

Confusion was clear in the tone of his voice, "W-What?"

"Get out of my house and never come back. Don't even try calling me."

I shut the door in his face and ran up the stairs, already crying. I went straight towards my mirror and took out my list. I tore it into pieces angrily. Stupid, that is what it is. Who was I to think that everything would go back to normal? How could I be dumb enough to believe that Ethan Reed, one of the most popular and good-looking guys in school would want to be friends with me, the sad loner? I'm so pathetic.

I lay on my bed facing the ceiling. I felt my phone vibrate in my front jeans pocket but I ignored it. It was probably the jerk. It buzzed again a few minutes later. I must have two messages by now. A while after that it was ringing. I did not want to talk to him so I took my phone out to turn the device off. But then I read the screen 'Katelyn calling...'.

Katelyn. She probably thinks I'm ignoring her by now. I cleared my throat and answered the call. 

"Hi Katelyn. Sorry I didn't realise my phone was ringing until now."

"No problem. Marissa are you ok? You sound a little off."

I now remembered why I had been avoiding talking for the past month even though she's been my best friend for years. She knew me too well, I couldn't hide anything from her. 

I sighed, "I'm fine."

I could imagine her narrowing her eyes at this, probably not believing a word I said. "If you say so. Anyways, I wanted to ask you if you wanna come back here for the weekend? My parents said it would be fine. And plus, we haven't seen eachother in ages!"

I thought about it and the time for this couldn't be any more perfect. Ethan had made me feel great but his friendship was fake and that hurt. And to heal myself from all the pain I needed a TRUE friend to help me out. Frankly, I can't think of a more perfect person to do this than Katelyn.  

"That sounds great actually." I smiled a little.

"So you'll be fine coming back to this city... since the accident?"

I hadn't considered that. Too late to back out now. Automatically I thought of the last thing on my list. Going back to my hometown and facing my past. The list which was now just non-existent bits of paper in the dustbin. "Yeah, I think so."

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