the japanese samuri were thought to be honorable in commiting suicide before they were killed by opponents.
indian women were thought noble and honorable for throwing themselves on their husbands funeral pyres so as to die with them than live without them.
now, suicide is an act of cowardice. it is an act of selfishness. it is an act of the weak.
but suicide is not an act of cowardice. it is not an act of weakness.
actions of weakness and cowardice and selfishness are commited by the people who are supposed to care. the people we are supposed to trust. they tell us it is all a phase, that it will get better. they tell us that we are teenagers and our hormones are raging and trying to sort out everything. they brush us away, they push us to the curb, the back burner, the back of their minds. they push us away because they can't cope with the fact that someone they created would feel this way. the happy child they raised, the lovely person they grew up with, the person they molded into thoughts of death and pain and knives and blades and loneliness.
cowardice is pushing someone to hurt themselves. cowardice is bullying. cowardice is preying on the pain of others so you feel better about yourself.
selfishness is refusing to believe that someone is in pain. selfishness is denying the truth to the point of no return. selfishness is not helping someone who needs you.
weakness is cowardice. weakness is selfishness.
it takes courage to take a blade, a gun, a wheel, a step and end your life. because there is no going back. there is no resurrection. there is no second chance.
pain drives us to do the unthinkable. it warps our thoughts and bends our minds to the place where it lives. only pain lives in death.
my emotions are raging. i'm so angry and sad and i'm cRYING and i can't stop
i can't even deal rn
it's tru tho
ok getting off my soap box