Charlotte's Choice

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I stand before the towering doors of the white church as I take in my last deep breath of fresh air. Tonight the night air is cooler than the usual blazing, blistering heat. Miserably, I slowly push open the heavy, elaborate doors of the church. When the doors are open, my eyes dart around looking for any signs of danger, but this is only out of habit and in this case it is also a silly notion. I will never walk out of this church alive. The dark thought digs it's way deeper into my mind. Although, it has been embedded in my head since the day I was told to make the choice.

After walking into the church and closing the doors, I look up to the glass dome shaped ceiling that shows the moon and stars. The moon is in full bloom within the black night. My eyes now flit to the walls of the church. They are a pale tan color on the inside whereas the walls are white on the outside. The only thing that is the same on both sides is the golden trim.

Another dark thought goes through my mind. Calloway Mullen. My love. I will never see him again. I slowly take in a sharp breath and my heart contracts. My breathing quickens with the rushing of my thoughts. It's me or them. It's my choice.

Is it really your choice?

Is it my choice? Yes. I was forced into this indisposition but I am choosing how it plays out.

The silver dagger, with blue stones and my family's motto, Bienvenue mort à bras ouverts, engraved on the handle, starts to shake in my left hand. I bid everyone I loved goodbye earlier today and they don't even know. I also wrote them each a letter explaining why I died and that I loved them all very much. I have a little over five letters sealed inside envelopes all in my right hand. I look around the dark, old church. I quickly allow a single tear to flow down my face before I position the point of the dagger over my heart. I give a silent farewell to my family and then to my love.

I will forever love you, my family.

Forgive me, Calloway.

The tip of the dagger kisses my chest as it draws out my blood. I can not live a day where they are all dead. The heavy church door opens loudly, slamming the wall and causing the entire church to shake. The person who opened the door is my love. "I love you, Calloway." I say before sinking the tip of the dagger deeper into my chest. The dagger doesn't pierce my heart. It is stuck on one of my bones. I let out a quick gasp while he simultaneously jumps to me and grasps the dagger's handle. He tries to pull it out, but I jerk backwards, releasing Calloway's grip of the dagger. The dagger rips down my entire belly from the force of me moving backwards. My body is burning with agonizing pain. Calloway runs to me with anger and pain on his face. "No!" Calloway yells as I slowly sink to the ground with his arms around me. He cleanly pulls the weapon out of my belly. I hear the clang it makes as it hits the ground. He slips his arms beneath me, to cradle my body to his chest. My body is staring to numb and I can not feel anything, but him. I cough up some blood onto his shirt before saying, "It was me or you, my loved ones. It was my choice." "I love you, my Charlotte." Calloway says while leaning down to kiss me. He kisses me lightly on the lips then, on my nose and forehead. I shake abruptly, trying to breathe. "Even when I am dying, you still somehow manage to take my breath away." I say. His body starts shaking and I think it's laughter. I look up at him, with my head in his lap, to see him crying. "My love. Do not weep for me. Grow old, my Calloway. Love another woman. Get married. Have kids. Be happy. I will always be with you. Please, forgive me." I whisper. Everything is getting blurry and I can't see well. "My dear, sweet Charlotte. For I will love you forever and always." Calloway whispers into my ear. I smile and close my eyes letting the darkness take me.

Forever and always.

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