After eating the piece of omelette, I felt like throwing up.
Fat, fat, fat.
Ugly, ugly, ugly.
Fat, fat, fat.
Calm down, a voice in my head said, you can work it all off at home.
But the other side of me wouldn't budge.
Fat, fat, fat, it kept on telling me, like a broken record. Look at you eating that omelette, you pig, the voices said, you'll never lose weight.
I took out my sacred notebook and opened it to today's entry.
Three slices of apple - 37 calories
Five wheat crackers - 78 calories
Taking a deep breath, I brought my pen down to the paper. One egg was about 78 calories, and we had used two and added veggies, right? I guess that one bite of the omelette would be around 20- 30 calories. Just to be safe, I picked the larger number.
One bite of omelette - 30 calories.
I had already had a few slices of apples in the morning and a few crackers for lunch, so I was way beyond my calorie goal.
How could I have done this? I was hyperventilating, and I slammed my notebook closed when I felt someone stand behind me.
I looked up and realized it was too late. My worst nightmare was coming alive.
"What the hell," Adrian whispered. "Nevaeh," he said, looking at me expectantly, "What is that?"
This could not be happening. "N-Nothing," I replied, "It's nothing."
His gaze went from me to the notebook and then back to me. "That wasn't nothing!"
I flinched, "Adrian, please." He took my journal from my hands before I could stop him and rapidly flipped through it. "Stop, that's my personal stuff!"
He stared at me in shock, "Personal stuff? Nevaeh this isn't—"
"No!" I exclaimed, rising to my feet, "No!" I snatched my notebook back from him and shoved it into my backpack. "Don't you dare. You don't know me at all so leave me alone!"
Adrian looked horrified. "You ate nothing yesterday, Nevaeh. Nothing."
"You're killing yourself."
"I know what I'm doing"
He scoffed, "You're killing yourself," he repeated, and I had the urge to punch him in the face.
YOU ARE READING
skin and bonesTeen Fiction
❝hey, what's that?❞ ❝n-nothing.❞ ❝...is that a food diary?❞ ➵ Nevaeh Anderson has been struggling with anorexia since the beginning of the school year. She's seventeen, in 12th grade, and she aims to only eat the least amount of food...