05 - Catharsis

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“If you are sorry then leave. Leave us alone”

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And that time, the vocal trainer sees something in Jin. A strong desire. A strong determination. Admirable for kid like him.

With that, days after that been the same, Jin practicing with the other members and him having extra vocal classes until the day of the evaluation day.

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Back in the dorm, the members didn’t actually pay any mind to Jin at all, completely ignoring him and only talk to him when it is necessary to. Jin was told that his bed is on the bottom bed of the double decker in the living room and that day, Jin learns where the other members room. Apparently, the dorm consist of three room and two bathroom. Yoongi and Namjoon shares the same decent size room which located near the front door and in their room, there is also a bathroom. Hoseok, Jimin, Taehyung and Hyosang share the same room, the biggest room in the dorm and lastly Jungkook.

Jungkook owns his own room because his room is the smallest there and just enough for himself. The double decker out there in the living room is for Taehyung and the old trainee, Minjae but because Minjae already left, Jin was told to take the bed. Since Jin was told that he own the bottom part of the double decker, he also own the storage drawers there under the bed. Three big drawers in total, enough to put all of his things.

On the day of the evaluation day, honestly all of them are prepared. Jin too. He didn’t feel any emotion at all although it’s his first time being evaluate and also marks his first time seeing all of the up ranking staffs including the chief executive officer himself, Bang PD-nim.

The order of the evaluation goes by Jungkook and Hyosang, then Yoongi, Namjoon and Jin, and lastly, Jimin, Taehyung and Hoseok. As always, when someone is performing, the rest of the members will take a seat at the corner of the room and watch the performance quietly, admiring the performance. During Jungkook and Hyosang performance, honestly there is nothing to say at all, everything went smooth. Jungkook did great as always with his vocal and Hyosang plays an important role too making their performance perfect.

If someone ask the original trainees of who is the one who should take the role as main vocalist, everyone without doubt will choose Jungkook. Although the Jungkook is the youngest, he sure can take the responsibility as the main vocalist well because he has passion. He has the passion of doing everything as good as he can. It may be a burden to carry the title as Main Vocalist of the group but Jungkook can and will always do great in whatever things he do.

Although Jin is new and barely a month knowing all of them, he too without any doubt will choose Jungkook as the main vocalist of the group. If he were to compare himself with Jungkook, it is call ‘useless’ and ‘ridiculous’ because what on earth is happening and he dare to compare himself to Jungkook? Ridiculous mind after all. Jungkook, Jimin and Taehyung. All three of them sing beautifully no close to Jin, sounding like a dying frog.

The first time his vocal trainer praise him is about three days before the evaluation day and that time, the joy and the happiness he felt is truly priceless. That time, he already can control and know how to use his vocal. Although he did feel great remembering the praise he got, now that he listen to Jungkook’s voice, his insecurity is climbing up again making him small. But, one thing for sure, if he got the lowest rank for this evaluation day, he will not be sad because he deserve it much to compare to the other members.

Truth to be told, if he get kick out after this evaluation day, he is not that sad either because Jin knows he himself lacks so many talents and skills from the other members, and yes, what Yoongi said before is true after all.

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