chapter 1

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Bimbo!! My mother echoed from the dining. "Your food is ready".

"I'm not hungry mom" I replied with every ounce of strength I could gather.

"Abimbola Akinwunmi" she shouted with a voice so loud I could almost feel my heart popping out of its place. "If I come over there, you'll tell me who's in charge of this house", "when you get to your husband's house you can do whatever you want but in this house we don't waste food!". My mom can be erratic at times but I still love her and although she siezes every opportunity to remind me that I'm yet to be married, I'm sure she only has my best interest at heart.

Its a very cold Saturday morning at my mother's house. I always spend the weekends here, well because mom needs all the company she can get and I wouldn't dare to miss the gist of how many good guys she had met during the course of the week that would have made great husbands for her daughter. But this weekend was different, I'm lying here in my room, on my king sized bed with no appetite for food whatsoever, helpless against the plethora of thoughts ravaging my mind, trying to figure out what I must have done wrong for kola to have dumped me with such reckless abandon. With every thought of him my heart sunk deeper into an ocean of inexplicable sorrow. He didn't even tell me why he was breaking up with me. All he could possibly conjure up was that I was too good for him, too good for you? Who says that to a lady? Is there such a thing as being too good? Is loving someone with all your heart now an offense? I mean I did everything I thought I was supposed to do, I was a good girlfriend, I washed his clothes, cooked for him, I even gave him my body for which my mom would kill me if she finds out. I spent my money on him. Was he expecting me to love him less just so he could feel secure or was he just the usual "Yoruba demon". " oh such a f*****g coward" I shrieked in anger as I pressed my face into a pillow. I hated him so much now for making a fool out of me. I couldn't hold it anymore, I had to let out the river of tears I had dammed for so long from flowing. I know I swore never to cry because of a guy but I couldn't help it, this was too painful. I shut my eyes so tightly wishing this was all a bad dream and that when I opened them it would be okay.

I opened my eyes only to see my mother at the door with a concerned look on her face. God knows how long she'd been standing there watching me. "Bimbo what is it?" She asked as she walked to the bed and sat beside me.

"Mom" I cried as I began to mumble a lot of words in between sobs and sniffs. "Kola broke up with me mom" I finally said, with enough clarity in my voice. This was a daunting reality I wasn't ready to accept yet. "He said I was too good for him mom", "what does that mean?" I asked as I Let out yet another painful cry.

My mother sat there speechless as she was clueless to why a man who claims to love a woman so much could just up and leave without even as much as a reason. You see my Father left us when I was 13 years old and I couldn't really understand it then but I understand now that you can never truly know a man until he decides to reveal his true nature. "Men are scum" I thought within me. My mother jerked me up from her thighs amidst my tears, she looked at me with so much intensity I knew I was looking at a different woman, a woman who had to be strong; strong enough to brave up to society and its condescension, a woman who had to break off from the emotions of being hurt by a man who never celebrated her worth, a woman starved of love but still summoned up the courage to love. She wiped the tears off my face with her wrapper, cupped my face into her tender hands and said " it is rather unfortunate that we keep meeting cowards as men" "but one day you will meet a real man who will love you for who you are".

"but he said he loved me?" I asked "does that mean nothing to him?


Please you can add your comments for me to see if I'm doing a good job.. Thank you so much guys for your support

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