CHAPTER 30

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Word count: 4466

ANGELA

"Oh, Angela, come on. You can't be this upset."

"He hates me. He honestly hates me. I'm pretty sure that the word that I can use is despise also," I muttered, burying my face in the pillow.

"But Nathan will never hate you. I know that he could never hate you," she soothed, attempting to calm my nerves.

"But he does hate me! You didn't see him that night. You didn't see how angry he was how he looked as if he wanted to punch someone. And I saw that disappointed look in his eyes."

Cierra huffed, patting my shoulder. "You still haven't told me what happened. What even happened between you two?"

"I don't want to talk about it, I can't. But all you need to know is that I did something stupid, I didn't tell him about something really important. And now he thinks that I don't trust him."

"And why didn't you tell him?" Cierra asked.

"Because I was embarrassed and fearful of what will happen. I didn't tell Nathan because honestly I didn't want him to know."

"Why would you be scared? Honestly, why would you be scared of telling him something? Why would that scare you?"

I buried my face in the pillow, breathing in and out deeply. "Because I didn't want him to judge me. It was a thing that happened once again and I told him about it before but I just didn't have the guts to do it again. I had a feeling that he would look at me differently and I didn't want that. I knew that I couldn't handle it if it happened."

"Angela, seriously? You can't really be serious. Jesus, hasn't he proven enough? If he stood by you before then why on earth would he not do it again? If he didn't judge you before then why would he not do it now?"

I blew out a frustrated breath, not wanting to answer. "I don't know. Maybe... just maybe I thought that he would actually not believe me. Maybe I thought that he would not be on my side. And I know that I could never handle that, I know that I could never handle him looking at me differently."

"Oh, Angela. Nathan is not like that. I know that he would never look at you differently," she spoke, trying to calm me down. "Hey. I know that he fancies you a lot, so don't even worry about that."

I pushed the covers off, sitting up on the bed. "But he still hates me. He is still so upset with me and I don't know what to do about that. I don't want him to hate me."

Cierra seemed to be in thought for a moment, before she answered. "Well, then we will have to do something to make him stop being bad at you. To make him lose that hate of wall that stands proudly."

"And what is your suggestion?"

Of course I was stunned by her idea, what she had in mind. And I did definitely not want to do that since it would have been beyond embarrassing. But I felt as if I had no choice since Nathan would not even answer my calls.

It had been a little over a week since the incident and I had not heard a word since that night from him. And I had no idea as to what to do, I wanted to make it up to him. Because he was right, I had taken advantage of his trust. Or more like, I had not trusted him at all.

And I was well aware that he had the right to be upset. I knew that it was my fault, it was entirely my fault. Since I really should have told him, I should have told him the truth the second I got in that car with him after school.

I should have even possibly called him right after.

But somewhere deep down there was a part of me that could not tell him. That made me feel like telling him was not the right thing. And maybe I was holding myself back because I was afraid of his reaction, of what he would think about me.

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