Runner

Chapter 26

unedited

Photo of Texas and Zaylee

Video and all I had no idea what I was getting myself into. Birthing is some scary shit. It was touch and go for me once she started pushing and things started coming out. And again when they asked me to cut the cord. I almost ended up in the floor at that point. But I stayed upright and after 12 hours of supporting my girl, one big poop on the floor, and a nurse threatening to kick me out. I am finally holding our beautiful baby girl in my arms. Tough biker my ass I feel like a fucking sissy.

The nurses had all been so impressed with how strong my Lilly was through the entire process of bringing our Angel into the world. (Not so impressed with me though.)

She never screamed, never cried, she just sat with me, and walked with me as she labored. One nurse even asked if she was sure she was in any pain at all!

My hand could attest to the fact that she was in pain though. Because she might not have screamed but she sure does have a good grip. I am almost 100% sure she broke one of my fingers from squeezing so hard. But she was the picture of calm a literal fucking champ.

That little women amazes me every damn day. She is the strongest most beautiful little warrior. Looking over I see her smiling at Zaylee and I. I'm such a little bitch because watching her watch me with that look on her face makes my heart skip a beat. I have missed her eyes on me, her voice quietly joking with me. She has been drifting in and out of sleep for the last several hours. It's been torture to have her so close but be stuck just watching her.

But my beautiful girl is exhausted and deserves a break. So I selfishly hold on to our baby as tightly as I can not allowing the nurses to touch her or anyone into our room. I can't  help but want some alone time with them before everyone gets here and wants their turn. So I just took my baby, who I can't stop staring at. She is absolutely perfect.

She has blue eyes and a head full of brown hair just like her Mamas. She is so tiny only weighing five and a half pounds but the doctor swears she is perfectly healthy to have been born early. She looks so tiny in my arms. She does not feel real.

The nurse and Lilly allowed ME to give Zaylee her first bath and id be damned if I didn't shed a tear or two. I would have thought that washing the afterbirth would have been disgusting. But it felt right, it was almost a spiritual experience for me. It was like they were all giving me permission to be her Daddy.

Shit I thought that I knew that I loved her when I saw her on the screen that night at the hospital or when I felt her kick her mama. But holding her, listening to her, watching her in my arms. This is next level love.

My love for my girls is nothing like I have ever felt before. Walking over to Lilly I hand her Zaylee so she can feed. I watch in amazement as our little princess latches on and starts sucking. Fuck.

"I love you." I whisper stroking Lillys hair. I have never said it to her out loud but now that I have I will never stop.

"You mean it?" She asks in the most timid voice. Fuck hours of pain and this is what scares my little warrior?

"With my whole heart baby. I told you, you and that angel are my future and I meant it."

Tears fall from my girls eyes but doesn't say anything back.

Short chapter don't hate me! But I thought it was better than nothing. Wattpad deleted this entire chapter and the two before it 😠 after it glitched! So I wrote this to the best of my ability but am super bummed reading over it. Definitely not my norm but I might go back over it later when my mind is in a better place. I'll let y'all know.