Stay With Me

Chapter 28

Song ATM: Demons by Imagine Dragons

"Cam?" I called walking in the house confused. His car was here but he never told me he was coming over.

"In your room" he yelled and I smiled hurrying up the steps. My parents just left for work, I guess they let him in.

After I got up the steps, I took my jacket off walking in the door then closing it. I smiled as I saw him laying on the bed with his hands behind his head listening to music.

"Comfy?" I asked walking to my closet to hang my jacket up and take my shoes off. "I will be once your head is resting on my chest" he said as he opened his arms for me with the big smile.

I giggled walking over to lay on the bed with him. He pulled me closer and kissed my head as I recognized the song playing Sam Smiths Safe With Me. "How was your day?" I asked.

"Really good, worked earlier, went over some things with California with my dad and then I decided to surprise you at home" he said. I planned on coming home and sleeping but I would take this over anything.

"That's good, he seems happy about it. Wait how long have you been here?" "About an hour" "So you laid here listening to music for an hour?" "Yup" he said and I froze confused as another song came on.

"You listen to The Neighbourhood?" I asked surprised as Afraid started playing. "No it's your iPad. Pretty good band though" "Yeah" I said smiling and it went silent for a few seconds.

"Is this how you feel?" He whispered. "Hmm?" "I always believe you can find out a lot about a person by the songs they listen to. I went to your most played songs and this was in your top five with Creeps and Strangers, Irresistible, Undone and of course Latch being number one" he explained smiling and I sighed.

"Do you feel like you've been replaced?" "By you?" "Nope because you're irreplaceable in my life but... to anyone else?" I bit my lip thinking as I laid on my stomach and leaned on my elbows not looking at him.

"You don't notice? I'm always free, my phone barely goes off, I don't say any thing to anyone in school really?" I asked.

He couldn't say he didn't notice it. He nodded frowning.

"It's not like oh no I'm so alone but, I'm just tired of trying with them" I whispered. "What do you mean?" "They all either got boyfriends or found someone better than me so I'm not going to beg them to be my friend or follow them like a lost puppy" I explained.

He turned on his side but I still didn't meet his eyes. "I guess it's good that we're going to Cali. We'll start over, meet new people and we can forget about these" "I guess you're right, who needs to deal with these people?"

"Not you, and not me. They don't even see the amazing person you are, the creative and innocent yet and inciting mind you have but I do and many others will too" He whispered pulling me closer.

I smiled and nodding meeting his eyes "Honestly, I didn't like Sophie much anyway. Self-centered a bit don't you think?" I chuckled and shrugged as he smiled kissing my head. "Once we leave this place, everything will work out" He whispered smiling rubbing my back and I agreed nodding.

"You know, I was really scared of moving before. Change makes me a bit nervous but your words make it better. Your presence just makes everything better" he smiled laughing. "I'm serious if you want to leave now I would" "Let's do it" he joked kissing my cheek as I giggled.

****

I jumped up as my phone rung. I looked at it to see mom. I groaned ignoring it. She was just calling to complain and start an argument as always. Not in the mood for that. I sat up surprised it was dark out but sighed getting up to strip and head to the shower. Another night of disappointment.

He was in anger management and I was happy he decided to go but, these dreams were killing me. I wanted him to get better and I could handle it awake but, my dreams continued bringing back memories or just showing things I wanted leaving me to wake up missing him more or on the verge of crying.

It's been almost two months and we had no contact at all. Strict policy. In time he would gain contact with more than immediate family so I would have to wait and now just hear how he was doing through this father.

He went to see him once a week but that's all they allowed. He said he was doing good and of course the first two weeks were hard but he was adapting right now. That's all I could ask for.

He was doing better.

I took a shower and once I got out, I went to get a shirt, panties and pajama pants when I saw my phone light up saying a voicemail and a missed call unknown. I hated unknown but there was a voicemail with it. I still went on and checked it.

"Hey it's me"

I froze up and let out a breath in relief. Just hearing his voice made me happy. Hell it made me want to cry.

"I know you don't answer unknown calls but this was the only way for me to reach you" he said then it went silent for a bit. "I just wanted to say...You were right, I needed help and now I'm getting it" He whispered and I smiled happy he accepted it.

"I've been doing better and I have the chance to go home but... Leah, I don't think two months is enough"

My smile dropped as my heart sped up looking at the phone. Was he -

"I need to stay here longer... I- I don't think California is good for me right now"

Tears filled my eyes as my heart broke. I know what he was doing. I didn't want him to but I-

"I don't want you to suffer from this anymore. I can't make you wait for me"

But I wanted to. I wasn't suffering - I was by his words right now.

"You need to go live without this holding you down"

Once the next words left his mouth, I broke.

"So... we can do this anymore. I'm sorry" I wanted to end the call and accept it but, I couldn't move. I felt myself going numb.

This was for the best, he needed this and because you love him so much, you will accept it and be proud of him. He's getting the help he needs. He wants help.

"Just because of this, it doesn't mean I still don't love you. I don't regret anything about our love except, hurting you. I love you so much, You are the main reason why I kept pushing. Even though I couldn't see you, these tattoos kept me going. They have been my calming factor" he said.

I looked at my wrist reading it over and over hearing his heavy breathing in the phone. I could even hear the sniffles. He was crying.

"I'm so sorry I have to do this. I love you. I will always be thankful for you bringing light into my life but I have to let you go"