90's Hearthrobs: Male Edition

18' - Allen Payne

Unedited.

"Diana I don't want you going to that park anymore. It's not safe! You know those drug dealers hang out there." My momma yelled up the steps from the kitchen.  I ignored her as the smell of the bacon & eggs she was cooking circulated through the house. My stomach growled as I applied my makeup and continued getting dressed.

I tied my thick braids up in a half up/half down updo, threw on some high waisted acid wash jeans, air max's and my oversized Karl Kani sweatshirt. I even tossed on my Purple Nike windbreaker for good measure. Fall was approaching Harlem quickly, and I was more than ready. I hated summer. What was cute about being sweaty 24/7 & having your makeup sliding off of your face cause of the heat? Nothing, I'd pass. 

"Diana, do you hear me talking to you?" My mom asked as she appeared in my doorway, with her hand on her hip and a spatula in the other. I glanced over and smiled at her as I continued to apply my cocoa tinted lip gloss. I smacked my lips together and nodded my head. "Yeah ma, I hear you." I grabbed my plastic cube purse and threw in my accessories.

"Phone... water...walkman ..beeper... wallet.. setting powder..keys.." I muttered as I randomly dropped stuff in my purse. I grabbed my basketball & a teddy bear out of the closet and pecked my mom on the forehead as I bounded past her and down the steps.

"What about breakfast?!" She asked as she peered at me from upstairs. "Not hungry! I love you mom. See you later." I yelled behind me as I shut the door. She didn't say anything but I saw her shaking her head.

I loved my mom more than life itself but she could be such a nag sometimes. It probably was because she was pretty young herself & didn't want me making the same mistakes she did at my age.

My mom had me at 18 years old, after falling in love with a kingpen from Queens named Chicago Regalas. I had never met my dad because he was shot and killed when I was 6. I missed him a lot, but I understood the territory that came with his occupation. For now, my mom was proving to be all I needed.

I made my way down the 12 flights of stairs leading down to the lobby of our apartment and stopped to catch my breath. The elevator was always out of order but I was used to it. Nothing ever worked in this building and if it did, it was mediocrely. 

As I made my way out of the building I stopped at the streetlight outside the building and blew a kiss at the shrine my neighborhood had set up for my best friend Raheem. He had been shot and left for dead in an abandoned building last fall. Today was not only the anniversary of his death, it was also his 18th birthday.

I smiled sadly as I looked at the picture tied across the pole and wished that I could hug him right now. My best friend was always so full of life & he never failed to make me laugh. I placed the teddy bear on the ground and stared at the shrine awkwardly. "I miss you Raheem. Happy Birthday." I sighed as I took one more glance, and turned to walk away.

The sun was out but the wind was picking up and I shuddered, zipping up my jacket as I made my way toward the park. Yes, the same park my mom told me to stay away from. I know it sounds bad, but the next park with a basketball court was 3 miles away. I was too lazy to walk and too broke to take the train.

As I neared the park, I heard the shouts, curses and grunts of men playing basketball before I actually set foot on the court. I made sure to put my headphones on even though no music was playing. I hated walking past huge groups of guys, especially when I was alone. They were there every week but I never paid much attention to them, except for one.

He was rude and cocky, always wearing loud flashy outfits, a bunch of gold chains and making passes at the women who crowded around to watch them play. I had never talked to him but his friends called him Gee Money. I knew that wasn't his real name but I low key didn't care either way.