Passionfruit

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"I don't want to go." Shawn mumbled to himself as he was struggling with his button up top. "I'm gonna have nightmares," he grumbled to himself. Shawn blew air of his cheeks and sat down, looking out the window at the grayish clouds as Passionfruit by Drake played softly from Justin's speaker.

Justin let out a sigh. "I don't wanna go either, kiddo." Justin was leaning against the railing of his window and took a deep breath and relaxed against it. "But we have to, he'd want us to be there. He looked over at Shawn who was sitting on the bed letting the cat lay on top of him, rocking slightly to the music. Justin smiled softly in Shawn's direction as he noticed that his shirt wasn't buttoned correctly.

"Hey, let me help you." Justin walked over to Shawn who took the opportunity and buried his head in Justin's chest as he unbuttoned his shirt and buttoned it up the correct way for him. He sat down next to Shawn who still had his head on his chest. Justin wrapped an arm around his brother and began to tap his back softly to the beat.

"you're just doing that to get eveennn," Justin kept singing along to the song softly, trying to keep his baby brother calm which was currently working. They were about to go to the funeral of one of Justin's team members who died in a terrible motor accident a week ago. The whole idea of him dying and having to go to his funeral was stressing Shawn out who not only was having issues due to his own family disappearing the way they did, but he also had a fear of funerals and corpses. "Passionate from miles away, passive with the things you say...passing up on my old ways. I can't blame you now..." Justin continued to softly sing which was putting Shawn at ease.

Shawn cuddled up closer to his brother who was now rubbing his back gently, rocking him softly. After a few minutes of just snuggling up against Justin, listening to him sing to him he got curious as to how his brother was processing this. "Justy? Are you okay?" He asked softly. Justin continued to rub his back and paused to answer him. "Yes, I'll be fine. Are you okay?" Justin asked in a nurturing voice, trying to keep his brother settle. Shawn processed the question before he answered and nodded. "Yeah, I guess so." he smiled sadly.

Justin saw his slight pout and kissed his forehead twice. Justin sighed and got up and grabbed his suit jacket and put it on. "We gotta get out of here, love," he said as he paused the music and grabbed his keys. Shawn sighed and shifted on the bed a little before getting up and grabbing his own suit jacket and throwing it on. "My stomach is bothering me, Justin." He groaned slightly, his anxiety being the primary cause of his stomach ache.

"I don't feel so good." Shawn mumbled quietly, not wanting to upset his brother. Justin walked over to him and kissed his forehead and wrapped his arms around him. "I have an idea of why you're not feeling good baby," he spoke softly, trying to keep Shawn as peaceful as possible, "Try to relax and not think so hard about this. I know it makes you think of the other funeral but we have to go and pay our respects honey." he kissed Shawn's ear and patted his back. "Come on, let's go."

Shawn nodded and got up, walking down the stairs. He grabbed his dress shoes and put them on. Justin went around to make sure everything was off and that they were set to go. Once Justin locked the door to the house, they drove off, heading towards the church that the funeral would be held in.

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Shawn and Justin finally arrived after a bit of driving and walked inside of the church. Shawn was having anxiety issues the entire time they drove towards the venue and it only got worse when they got there. Shawn bit his lip and grabbed Justin's hand, squeezing it tightly. Justin noticed Shawn's fragile state and kissed his head softly. "You'll be okay," he squeezed his brother's hand in reassurance. Shawn simply whimpered in reply and shook his head no.

"Are you okay?" Justin asked Shawn again as they stood outside of the door of the actual funeral as some other people stood around out there as well. Shawn's palms were sweaty and his stomach was bubbling. He felt as though he was going to cry and puke at the same time. He was looking a little pale too so Justin guided him over to the nearest bathroom and had him sit down.

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