Chapter Two: Harry's Mental.

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September 1, 1993:
Harry was shaken awake by Elise. Checking his watch on his nightstand he finds it's only nine. Cursing the twins, who'll probably sleep later then him he gets up. After going through his morning routine he lets Hedwig fly ahead and shrinks her cage putting it in one of his trunk compartments. After that he grabs Ahish, who lazily wraps part of his body on Harry's arm and rests his head on his shoulder. Then he heads down stairs and drops his trunk by Elise's and joins her for breakfast.

"Mornin'." He greets sitting down.

"No good morning?" She quirks an eyebrow.

"Nope." He pops his p.

Today he was wearing an oversized plaid shirt. It came close to his knees when standing, then he had ripped blue jeans, lazily tied combat boots that were sure to raise some eyebrows both muggle and magical. His boots were pink just like his headband that was holding back his fringe. He didn't want a haircut because he liked it being long enough to go past his ears but short enough to not touch his shoulders.

After breakfast they apparate to a designated spot in the magical part of the train station. While heading to the train Harry could feel people staring, and even hear some whispering about Ahish; Harry ignored them be cause he spots his parents, godfather and uncle with the Weasleys and the Boy-who-lived. The twins were gone from the group, he heard the warning whistle, and quickly looks forward realizing he had completely stopped walking. He took note most were warily walking past him fast. Taking a quick look at the group he watches as his brother is hugged lovingly by their mother; while his father gives him a clap on the back smiling proudly. His own godfather hugged him and was telling him something while smiling proudly. His brother's godfather doing the same, and he felt an ache. It was overwhelming, the sudden onslaught of longing for such affection from his family that it was quickly morphing into an ache that Harry only knew one way to relieve.

He quickly looks away as if he'll be burned, and boards the train. Before joining Elise who no doubt found the twins he finds a bathroom. Locking himself into the bathroom he pulls his shirt up and on the exposed abdomen one could see faint scars. Aiming his wand he mutters a quick and simple cutting curse. The ache lessons but not enough. He mutters a second one, and feels the ache lighten. He watches the blood flow from the two well placed cuts. They weren't enough, he could still feel the ache in his throbbing heart. The constriction in his throat was causing the blurring of his eyesight, and the heaving from his lungs. He cast another cutting curse. Then again, and again, and again. Until his abdomen is painted red, nothing but a beautiful red, and he wonders if death was as beautiful.

He healed himself and cast a few cleaning spells. The ache was gone, he could see clear, and breathe once again.

Finding his friends...his family, he joins them, and laughs at the twins' antics. He would never burden them, he knew Elise since she started dating George was no longer needing to cut. She was able to confide in him in a way she couldn't with others, with him.

He felt another ache worming its way through. Elise and George were happy together. Fred was pining after another girl, one in slytherin. Harry knew Daphne Greengrass in all her ice cold being reciprocated Freds feelings.

And Harry? He had no one. No one he found he could be so open, loving, vulnerable with. Afterall last time he was like that it was thrown in his face by his own blood.

So he promised himself to never ruin this, not to become a burden like he did with his own blood. To become nothing but a distant memory tossed away, to be forgotten. He swore in that moment as he watched George and Elise happily holding eachother laughing at something Fred said. Seeing Fred smile like there was no tomorrow, he would not burden them. Burden them with his feelings, thoughts, and pathetic woes.

He'll die before he does that to them, his friends, his siblings, his family.

Hogsmeade station:
The train clmes to a stop and Elise is still glaring daggers into Harry while Fred and George snicker.

"I cannot believe you!" She hisses at him.

"What? I don't see the problem. Im peacefully protesting!" Elise snorts at this.

"Bullshit! Your doing this because majority of Slytherin and Snape still consider you an outsider. Your doing this to piss them off and lose house points!"

"Exactly! Protesting peacefully!" He grins at her.

She just huffs and stalks out of the train. With the other three traoling behind. As the board a carriage they are joined by Draco Malfoy, Daphne Greengrass, and Blaise Zabini. Elise sits on George's lap to make room for the latter.

Malfoy looks at Harry and quirks his eyebrow. These three have been, since middle of last year, actually trying to get to know him and include him. Harry grins at the three.

"Hello," he happily says, "how were your summer holidays?"

Malfoy answers him with a question, "Not to bad, spent it mostly with my cousin. He'll be joing us, he's a fourth year. So, Harry, whats with the hideous outfit?"

Daphne interjects, "Is that how muggle teens dress? Fred I see your not wearing hand me downs. What changed?"

Harry barks a short laugh, "Not all muggle teens dress like this, and im peacefully protesting, thats whats up with this hideous outfit." He answers the two.

Fred quickly says, "Daphne, thanks for noticing. George and I came into some money from a business venture. Never to early to start. Looking as beautiful as ever."

Draco sneers at the sickening display of feelings between the two. "Peacefully protesting? For what and how long?"

Blaise listened to them two while ignoring the other four.

Harry smiles at Draco, "That's the thing it's all year seeing as I never brought with me nor bought new uniforms for this year. All I have are my regular everday clothing. The reason why is simple. Those who refuse to recognize me in the house can deal with me losing us house points on a constant until further notice."

Draco became pale, while the other two stared at him like an idiot. Draco kept thinking of how his godfather was going to react. Before any of them could say a word the carriage stopped.

They were in front of Hogwarts.

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