I Think I Love You.

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I saw Ambria and Louis standing at my door. It was getting really crowded so Maci took Grace home for the night, Jess left too. Ryinn and Justin we're the two people I was going to beg to stay.

Cammi was sitting down feeding the baby with the bottle that the hospital gives. Ambria made her way over to me and hugged me. Louis just stood there. I saw he had flowers in his hands. some were red, pink, white, yellow and orange. I motioned him to come in.

Cammi shortly left and after Ambria held Chandler, She left. Ryinn said he'd give Louis a ride. "Umm guys can I talk to Louis alone?" I asked. Justin and Ryinn nod and Justin handed Chandler over to me then shut the door.

"Why didn't you tell me you were having a baby?" Louis asked. "I didn't want you to know, to see me like this, I hoped next time you came, he'd be older, an I could tell you then, maybe it'd be easier." I said as I got teary eyed just looking at Louis.

"Can I confess something to you?" He asked. I nodded my head yes. "I- I know you just had another man's baby, and don't be ashamed of him, cause you have support, from Justin, Ryinn, Maci, Jess, Ambria and I, from everyone, it's just. I support you cause, I think I love you."

"What?" I asked, not thinking I heard him right. "I really like you, and I'm debating if I love you or not," He said.

"Louis I've liked since I was eight years old, you were my biggest crush, but I don't know where my feelings with anybody are, I don't know how I feel about Justin, and truthfully him and I need to get figured out first, I don't know if I love him, for him, but I love him cause he's Chandlers dad, But I like you, cause you never treated me different, you treated me like normal, You were nice to me, and you were a funny guy, But I'll definitely let you know where we stand when I can figure it out." I said looking at him.

I looked down at my baby sleeping, then back at Louis. I could feel Louis put his lips on mine, I looked at him cross eyed thinking what is he doing. Due to the circumstances with Justin, it didn't feel right and pulled away.

I let him hold Chandler and let the other boys come back in. Ryinn came in first shaking his head, and closing the door. "Ryinn whats wrong?" I asked.

"Dhalia's here, and Justin's dissecting her tonsil's with his tongue." Ryinn said rolling his eyes, then sitting in one of the chairs.

I was crushed. My face went completely pale. I told Ryinn to have Justin leave. I could hear them fighting in the hall which made me cry more. But I had Louis in there with me to calm me down.

Finally after 25 minutes I could hear the murmurs, yelling, talking, shouting and footsteps stop.
I just held my sleeping baby and rocked him and kissed him and tried enjoying this new experience.

Justin and Dhalia had finally left. Justin hadn't even come inside to say good-bye to his son. Ryinn came back in. Rubbing his face with his hands.

"What happened?" I asked in a stuffy voice. "I lost my best friend." Ryinn said shaking his head in disbelief. 

I felt the tears pouring down again. "But it's okay." Ryinn said, which made me control my tears. "I'd choose my nephew any day over that prick." He said smiling. I smiled then put my head on my pillow and fell asleep.

For the first time on my very exciting, heart breaking, loving, truthful, painful, exhausting day. This is to much crying, for one day, even for someone who just had a baby.

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