Chapter 70.

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"And I'll use you as a warning sign
That if you talk enough sense then you'll lose your mind

And I found love where it wasn't supposed to be
Right in front of me
Talk some sense to me"


I've taken the day off work today, and I'm shitting bricks over it.

I knew Harry was free this Wednesday, so I decided to bite the bullet and try something with him thats been on my mind now for a while, with all the research I've been doing, I'd like to do something for him.

Here's hoping it doesn't blow up in my face.

For once when I picked him up and he asked where we were going, I was the one that got to say 'It's a surprise'.

He gave a suspicious look, but seemed intrigued and kept giving me side glances as I drove, smirking to himself.

I had taken him to visit Ludo before we left, just so neither of them missed out on a day with each other and the surprise in Ludo when Harry turned up early was priceless.

He spun in happy circles in his kennel, and the smile on Harrys face made my heart melt.

Our first stop isn't that far off a drive, but my hands are already shaking, and I have to grip the steering wheel with white knuckles to try and stop them.

Harry has noticed my anxious mannerisms, and asked if I was okay, when I said I was fine he looked at me like I was so full of shit but thankfully didn't push it.

God I hope this is worth it.

I'm terrified.

I also keep thinking about Sunday, when he nearly drove me to knocking me out just to make me angry enough to bring out that side of me he's always been able to see but I couldn't.

How much trust he had in me with that is huge.

I know Harry always needs to be in control, I've learnt that comes with trauma, because he had none as a child which explains a lot about him and how he acts, relinquishing that means being vulnerable and feeling unsafe which is monumental for him, the fact he wanted to feel that with me.

Above all, more than anything else, as much as I love him, I love that he has someone that he can trust that way, that I was able to give that to him.

I will never take that for granted with him.

When we park the car, Harry gives me a strange look, and I just smile at him trying to swallow the urge to vomit.

I blow out a deep breath, undoing my seatbelt and gesture at him to get out the car "C'mon, let's go"

He just stares at me, trying to figure out what I'm up to, but undoes his seatbelt and follows me out of the car.

He walks behind me, as we walk up to the building and stops me, grabbing my wrist and making him look to me, glancing down when he feels the trembling in my hands.

"What's going on Abby?" he asks, looking over me concerned.

I blow out a breath, tugging my arm to urge him to follow me "You'll see"

He frowns, not liking the uneasy tone in my voice but follows me apprehensively.

We walk through the automatic doors, and even the ding makes me jolt because my nerves are so shot to shit and Harry places his hand on the small of my back as I walk towards the front counter, like he's trying to comfort me, even though he doesn't know what from yet.

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