He wanted me to know he knew where she worked, that he could get to her.

I know that little bitch Andy told him what happened to save his ass, the little snitch, I knew he was stupid but I didn't realise he was that stupid.

I felt that same nauseous feeling I did the night I heard that voicemail, I want to keep her safe, and no matter how much I need her, I know that I'd lose her in my life to protect her than to lose her completely because of someone like him.

That fucker has no idea what door he's just opened for himself.

I'm not a little kid that can't defend myself any more, I'm a grown man, a fucking crazy one thanks to him.

No one goes near my Abby.

I did listen to her this time though, I stayed with her and she did a pretty good job of distracting me to keep me there, climbing ontop of me with the innocent doe eyes of hers like a little kitten, god she could have me on my knees begging her so fast and she has no idea.

"She's really important to you isn't she?" Jimmy asks, but it sounds more like a statement.

I glance sideways at him, keeping my voice passive "Very observant of you"

"Well I like her" he says, shoving his hands in his pockets "You deserve some happiness, I think she's good for you"

I glare ahead, pressing my lips together firmly, I don't need your sentimental shit Jimmy.

"I don't deserve it" I reply flatly "and I know she's good for me, I'm just not good for her. Too selfish to stay away from her though"

Jimmy frowns, giving me a disproving scoff "You do deserve it, after everything that's happened to you, you deserve it more than anyone else I know. And I think you're good for her, maybe not in the same way she is for you - but there's different types of good, you just can't see it yet"

I screw my nose up, looking at him "When the fuck did you become Yoda?"

Jimmy sticks his chin in the air, smirking to himself "Steve and I have been listening to some audio books together, positive affirmations and all that. You should try it"

I shake my head, looking ahead again "Of course you fucking have"

We walk for in a few more minutes in silence, until Jimmy clears throat and looks at me cautiously "Does she know? About you know...your tapes and that?"

My face hardens as I tense my jaw "No. She doesn't"

"Are you gonna tell her?" he questions further, sounding curious about my answer.

"I don't know" I say bluntly.

Jimmy nods, looking at the ground "Maybe... If you explained it... You know, why you do it, it wouldn't go as bad as you think it would. She's a smart girl, she cares about you, she might understand"

I scowl, snapping at him "How am I meant to explain that? How could anyone understand it?"

Jimmy looks to me sympathetically "I understand it, Steve does too"

I blow out a heavy breath, chewing the gum in my mouth harshly "I know"

"You have your reasons Harry, no one knows what it was like to go through what you did. What you do might be fucked up to most people, but your intentions are in the right place - and I know how much it messes you up, but I can't blame you for it. I know she doesn't come from the world we do - but maybe you should have more faith in her" he says, and I just focus on the ground as we continue to walk and shrug my shoulders.

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