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December 22nd 2018

Dear Noah,

I'm so glad it's vacation. 

You have been bringing my work from school home to me everyday, I appreciate it, but I haven't been doing much of it honestly. Mom has told everyone she knows I have some illness, some awful bug, so that she doesn't have to tell them the real reason her daughter is deteriorating right before her own eyes. 

Today you came over so we could watch Christmas movies all day long. While we sitting together on the couch, I found you trying to be closer. You would look over as if to ask me something, but immediately turn back to the television. 

Finally you asked me, "Blair, I want to hold your hand. Is that okay?"

I couldn't breathe just thinking about it. You told me that it was okay, that everything was okay. You reached out for my hand and I didn't find myself pulling away. As you grabbed it my breathing quickened, you noticed of course. All you did though was squeeze it tighter, promising it was going to be okay and I found myself leaning into your chest. 


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