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When we walked into the bedroom I could still feel the apprehension in Harry, I have no idea why he's so nervous around me all of a sudden, it's just a bed, it's not like I'm throwing him in a snake pit.

I close the door behind us, and sit my phone on the bedside table, scrolling through it to put some music on and turning the volume down to a reasonable level.

I can't fall asleep without music, I've always been like that.

"Do you mind if I play music? I usually sleep with it but if it will keep you awake I don't have to have it on" I ask, turning to look at him standing next to my bed behind me.

Harry shakes his head, giving me a warm smile "No I sleep with music on too most of the time, I don't mind at all"

I smile back at him, wondering if the warmth in me is from the way he's looking at me or all of the vodka I've drank, it's probably both.

"Hey, I'm just gonna use the bathroom, and then we can jump into bed okay?" he says, hooking his thumb behind to point to the ensuite.

I give him a nod, turning to throw some of the extra pillows off the bed - I have a thing for pillows, you can never have too many.

He walks to the bathroom and I glance at him, watching him throw his shirt off and tossing it on the chair in the corner, seeing the definition of the muscles in his back flex at the action, leaving him in only a pair of basketball shorts and I suck in a breath.

He closes the door behind him, and I let the air in my lungs out, blinking at the door trying to decipher why that made my stomach flip.

I've seen Harry shirtless more times than I can count, but recently it's starting to make my insides feel weird around him, just like it did in my dream.

Does being attracted to a man, feel the same as a woman? Do you find the same things attractive?

I've always gone weak in the knees over the curves of their hips, how soft they are, the way the round flesh of their behind feels in my hands.

And boobs, man, boobs are fucking delightful.

But what about men? What do you look at?

I'm not sure how guys feel about getting their pecks groped, while getting their nipples played with - like I would with a woman, do they like that?

I mean, I'd have no boobs to play with, so that would be my natural instinct with it.

I try thinking about what Finn tells me he finds attractive, but then grimace at half of the graphic things he's told me.

I still can't look at cucumbers the same way.

Ruined salads for me.

I can't help myself wondering though, if anything about a man would affect me the same way it does with a woman, how different their bodies are, their needs, it's so foreign to me.

It's confusing.

My tipsy brain is going to some weird places.

I sigh, undoing my jeans and pulling them off, before I slip my shirt over my head and tossing it.

I walk over to my dresser, slipping my bra off and dropping it on the floor, before I pull the drawer open to find a shirt to sleep in.

I hear the bathroom door open behind me, not paying much attention to it until I hear a yelp from Harry behind me followed by a giant thud.

I spin around cupping my hands over my chest to see Harry face down on the floor groaning, fuck this kid is clumsy.

"Harry what happened? Are you okay?"

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