The Greatest and Worst Month (Thorki Cop AU)

Chapter 21

When I walk back in, I find they watch a different feed. In a dimly lite room, I stand in front of Brie. Her bald head shines with sweat.

A man walks into and places a revolver in front of us, before walking to the door "Six chambers, one bullet, no way to tell which chamber it's in." before opening the door "If you hesitate, you are out. If you flinch, you are out."

I walk towards her and hold out my hand "Loki."

"Brie." she gives a weak smile.

I pull her towards me and whisper "You go first. They want us to be scared." inaudible to the camera, before walking to my end of the table and smirking "Ladies first!"

The game is over in matter of seconds. Her chamber is empty, then mine is as well. Third and fourth are empty. Fifth is empty. We share a knowing look as she hands me the gun, and I place it to my head without a second thought. When I pull the trigger, neither of us move, and a boom sounds out.

When I put the gun down, she lets out a breathey laugh "It was a blank!"

We look to each other and and laugh, before I cover my chest and lean on the table "Brie?" she looks to me and I frown "Like the cheese?"

"Like the god?" she replies.

I clear my throat and they look back at me as I lean against my desk "She was my first partner."

They look at me with a guilty face and I shrug "Our first UC assignment was that she was a guard to a Nigerian, Arabic, terrorist, and I was to get in bed with the terrorist." Tony shuts off the feed, before I continue "We had a rat, in our group, and Brie was taken to be tortured. No matter how hard she had it, she did not blow my cover."

"What happened to her?" Barton asks.

"I finally got to see her." I nod, before shaking my head "She was naked, mutilated. Her eyes were burnt out of their sockets, her foot was chopped off. If she would have lived, she would be living in hell. She told me a code word, that she knew would lead me to kill her, before biting off her own tounge. And I buried a dagger into her skull."

They look at me in disbelief and I shrug "We all had something like that. Death could be as simple as terrycloth." I shrug it off, before reminding "That's just how we lived."

I chuckle, before pointing towards the screen "It wasn't all bad. We had some good times." Tony plays the footage and it cuts to Brie.

"Video number one." She smiles, before explaining "Location, classified. But as you can see-" she leaps down on my bunk, which I sit on, reading a book "By my partners dreads, we're in a very sandy location!"

"I'm not shaving my head." I state and she snickers as I flip a page "You might look fantastic with a shaved head, but I?" I shake my head "That's a defiant no."

Brie laughs, before nudging me "So, tell the camera the big news!"

"We passed!" I cry out, before putting the book aside "And we have our first mission tomorrow, so we should read up about our targets, and go to bed!"

"Fine, I'll put the camera down." Brie sighs, and turns off the camera. The tape cuts again and it's me, playing a game of solitaire "Tell the camera what's happening?"

"We just finished our first mission, and we kicked arse." I smirk, before looking at her "Who are you sending these to, anyway?"

"My dog." she states and I scoff, before she explains "And my mom. She worries about me being here."

"Well, you can take care of yourself." I tell her.

The tape skips to a stop and I explain "She died about a quarter of a year into our last mission together. My cover was blown. And I slaughtered every last people in the terrorist cell. I became The Trickster of the Middle East."

"Wait, you slept with a terrorist?" Steve asks, before frowning "A female terrorist?"

"Yes." I state and he raises an eyebrow to me "I believe Brie had a video diary for that." Tony turns to the computer and I tell him the date.

Brie steps forward with her camera and states wailing in laughter, as my hair is at friz ball "Shut up!" I order, but she continues "I got our new assignment!" I grovel "I have to bleach my hair!"

"I got the assignment, too." she sighs, as I pull my hair back "I heard you have to sleep with the target." I give a short nod, before she asks "How do you plan to do that? You're the gayest person I know."

"That's what I told the chief!" I exclaim, before shaking my head "The only woman I ever slept with, was the mother of my child, and we were both watching porn."

"Well, if it's any consolation, her file says she's circumcised." Brie states and I scrunch my nose.

"How the fuck am I supposed to go down on that?" I ask and she laughs "Seriously, how am I supposed to get a hard on for her?"

"Pretend it's a dude!" she shrugs, and I sigh.

"I'm not the one to go downstairs!" I cry out, before covering my face "I'm fucked!"

"No, you're going to do the fucking!" she insists and I groan, before grabs the bottle of bleach "Do you want help bleaching your hair?"

"I'd rather drink it." I grovel and she snickers "Alright, fine! Let's bleach my hair!"

The camera cuts to Brie laughing her arse off as I dry my hair "You look like a chicken!" she jokes.

"We still have to tone it." I state and she cracks up, causing me to bow my head and laugh like an idiot "Fuck it! I'm done with this bullshit!"

Brie sighs "Alright, let's finish your hair!"

The camera cuts again and Brie smiles down at me as I dread my hair again "It looks good! It suits you!"

"After all, I'm supposed to be Siberian." I smirk as I continue in a Russian accent "Wery nice to meet you."

"So how do you plans on readying yourself for our mission?" she asks.

"By watching lesbian porn." I nod, before explaining "Maybe I can figure out what the hell I'm supposed to do."

The tape cuts and my friends look to me "How can a woman be circumcised?" Thor asks.

"I'm not explaining it." I declare, before sighing "Look it up if you must."