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I looked out the crowded cafe, hoping to find her standing outside but she had already dashed through the people and sprinted out the nearest exit. I shouted her name multiple times but she didn't turn back. I didn't expect her to.
I followed her outside and found her crossing the parking lot, onto the road.
I had to run to catch up to her.
"Farah!"
"Go away, Micheal."
"Can you please just listen to me!?"

"The is nothing to listen to. I heard enough two years ago." She didn't look back. She stood at the end of the sidewalk, waiting for the cars to pass.

"Farah! Listen to me!" Before I knew it, I pulled her and turned her around so that she was facing me.

"OW!" There were tears streaming down her delicate face and I felt more coming.

I took her warm hand in mine and pulled her with me across the parking lot, and back in front of the mall entrance. She didn't let go of my hand, nor did she refuse to come with me.

"I did not mean what I said that night. I know you won't believe me but it would kill me if I didn't fix things between us and I die tonight". She was looking at everything but me. Her eyes couldn't find mine. I was going to break right here if she didn't look at me. "I was stupid, okay? I hate myself for hurting you. I couldn't sleep without thinking about how I could make it up to you. All I got from that was the feeling of emptiness," She looked at me, wiping away her tears but she didn't say anything so I continued. "Baby, I'm not asking for another chance because I know I don't deserve it. I just want you to forgive me."

When I saw that she didn't respond, I asked again, "Farrah, can you forgive me?". She looked so deep into my eyes, I thought she would unveil all my flaws and every sin I've committed against her on that night I violated her.

Thinking for the millionth time about that night made my stomach churn. How could I have been so selfish? How could I hurt the best person that came into my life? How could I destroy what we had? I was a fool to think that we could ever be together again. But I only hoped that she would find it in her heart to forgive me.

Farah had an odd way of expressing her feelings and I knew this because she threw herself in my arms and held onto my abdomen so tightly I thought I would pass out. She un-stuffed her face from my coat and looked up at me.
"I'm gonna friking kill you if I survive tonight." She let go of me and I pulled up her fur-edged hood to keep her from the cold.
"That is...if I survive," I replied. I did doubt my survival tonight as I didn't turn up for extra training with the guys. I hope it's still not too late.
"How 'bout I drive you home?"
"You don't have a car, genius,"
"I can always get n Uber, right?" With that, I took out my phone and got an Uber. The app said the driver should be here in 10 minutes.
Until the Uber showed up, we took the time to catch up. I found out that she took IT courses aside from her regular daily school day and dropped out when she had enough practice to learn on her own. Then she focused on school and was planning to major in biology. As a side job, she might continue hacking. After I finished interviewing her, it was her turn.

"Don't ask why I want to know this but, do you know how to use a gun?"she randomly asked.

I replied honestly,"Yeah. You?"

She shook her head and continued to ask me questions."Have you ever smoked?"

"Yes, in fact, I think I need one right now. Do you mind?"I asked. Again, she shook her head so I took out my 5th cigarette of the day. I lit it and took a deep inhalation. I held the drug inside my body for as long as I could, then slowly released it in the air, in a big cloud of smoke. I looked over at Farah who was watching me, mesmerized by the thick fog it produced in in the dark evening sky.


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