Chapter 14.

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"I was confused by the powers that be
Forgetting names and faces
Passers by were looking at me
As if they could erase it

Baby, did you forget to take your meds?"

Baby, did you forget to take your meds?"

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**

Maybe pre-drinking before I got here wasn't the best idea, I'm ten times more clumsy.

I feel fuzzy though, like a fuzzy wuzzy teddy bear.

I grab onto Sophie's shoulders as I stumble, and her arms shoot out to steady me "You good?" she checks, raising her voice over the music.

I hiccup as I nod, my head flopping dramatically "I'm greeeeat"

For sober me, that would be a lie. But drunk me is having a great time.

I've spent most of my time since we got here two hours ago dancing with Sophie, and drowning myself in vodka like it was oxygen and I was an asthmatic.

I can't remember the last time I had this much fun, every other time I've come here I've been crippled with anxiety or worry, or even worse - sober.

This time however, I don't even know if I can feel my face.

Our dancing has mostly been flailing limbs and horrible attempts at dance moves we see on the internet, I also attempted the moon walk.

I can safely say I'm no Michael Jackson, I ended up on flat on my ass.

Sophie is just as drunk as I am, and poor Jacob is acting as our sober-ish Nanny.

I didn't tell Sophie what happened tonight, she noticed the marks on my arm and I said I walked into something at home, not ready to deal with the reality of it yet.

I just need to be numb tonight, I don't want to do what I should be doing, I want to do what I want for once.

Andy would be irate if he knew this is where I was, not to mention drunk.

Well you know what? Good.

Fuck Andy.

And fuck Harry too.

I saw him when I first got here, sat on that same couch as last time, surrounded by the exact same group of people snorting god knows what, and a woman straddling his lap like he was getting a performance at a strip club.

To be fair, this place isn't that far from a strip club, the dancers on the stage here just keep their clothes on.

I hoped I was hallucinating at first, that I wasn't actually seeing him, that he wasn't staring straight back at me.

I could've have sworn I saw the faintest look of shock on his face, but if it was, the insecurity in me just told me it would be that he was shocked because he didn't want to see me.

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