Mermaids And The Vampires Who Love Them

24. THE LAVA LAMP OF LUMINESCENT WISDOM

"Cool, Wave."

Cupid's scroll winds up, revealing the next part of the plans. The heading is now 'Food,' and lists the items we discussed before I went to the god-sized bathroom.

"Now, where was I?" Cupid says. "Oh, yes, food. We'll have everything we discussed earlier—raw meatballs, fairy cakes, Chinese, garlic pizza, and blood. Plus, blood-free beverages for the hemophobic."

Cupid looks up from the list. "Thunder is in charge of security."

"If anyone is out of line, my security team and I will tie them to trees." Thunder hits his hand with his fist.

"Sounds like an effective deterrent," says Cupid. "I think we've got a plan."

"Finally! Now, can we talk about what we know about the bay being poisoned by a corporation that is blackmailing Shelly's father, that possibly kidnapped Shelly's mom, and that wants more mermaids at the school for some unknown, but probably sinister, reason?" I say all in one breath.

"What?" says Lily-Bella.

"Blackmail?" says Thunder.

"More mermaids?" says Fintan.

"Guess we're done with this." Cupid waves his hand in the air, and the scroll rolls up like a lizard's tongue and disappears.

"Tell us what you and Pierce found out," Lily-Bella says. "We were all dying to know, but we didn't want to wake you this morning after what happened ..." I bite my lip to hold back tears, and she trails off. "Oh, sorry, Wave. News spread through the cafeteria like wildfire. The whole school knows."

"It's alright, Lily-Bella. Gossip travels just as fast at an underwater school as a land-based one. I know how it works. And you guys don't have to keep apologizing about Pierce just because I found out he wasn't my boyfriend so much as my bodyguard. Now he's gone."

"He got kicked out for protecting me," Lily-Bella says. "I told him not to, but he wouldn't listen."

"Pierce is stubborn like that. No one blames you. If it's anyone's fault, it's mine. I am the one who asked you to steal the wand," I say. "And now I don't even know where he is."

"Why don't we find out?" Cupid proposes.

"How?"

"We'll scry."

"How does that work?"

"I look into my magic lava lamp and ask it to show me Pierce. It's pretty simple, really."

"So, you can spy on anyone whenever you want?" I ask.

Cupid gets up from the bed. "Gods need something to make their eternal existence entertaining."

"You're kidding, man," says Thunder.

"Don't worry, Thunder. The gods mostly like to watch humans. They're far more entertaining than any other creatures."

Cupid pulls one of the lava lamps off of a shelf and places it on the shag carpet next to the bed. "Come on, everyone. Have a seat."

We sit in a circle around the lamp. Cupid waves his hand again, and the Hawaiian-print curtains close. The room is dark except for the glow of the lamp. Red and gold swirls of wax dance eerily in the oil.

"Show us your secrets, oh lava lamp of luminescent wisdom!"

The colors swirl. They're coalescing into a shape! I can't believe it. Will I really get to see Pierce? The wax in the oil forms itself into a tongue sticking straight out at Cupid. My heart sinks.

"You are the dumbest lava lamp I've ever owned!" Cupid roars. A wind blows through the room. There are little lightning bolts and claps of thunder. "I am a god, so get in line pronto and show me Pierce Knightguard, or suffer my wrath!"