14 | plan of action

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+haechan pov

I left the hospital in tears. She didn't remember me...

What if she never remembered me and I'd just have to move on? I don't think I could do that, I love her too much.

As I walked down the street I bumped into what seemed like a pink blue with a bouquet of flowers in her hand.

'I'm so sorr- h-h- Haechan?' She stuttered. I'd never seen her before, she was probably a fan. I could tell from the expression on her face. 'Oh, are you okay?' Her excited expression dropped and she sounded concerned.

'Not really.' I laughed through my tears.
'Well, I hope you feel better soon and that everything is okay!' The girl smiled and from here I could see that what I thought was a bouquet of blue flowers was actually a bouquet of blue lollipops.
'Thank you.' I bowed a little and smiled before turning and walking away.

She seemed nice...

'I thought I'd be the one crying when I met my bias not the other way around.' I heard her sigh as she walked away, I turned and raised an eyebrow but she didn't see me as she had her back turned to me.

I fished around in my pocket for my phone, tears falling once again when I saw my lockscreen; a photo of the Polaroid photo Mara and I took the night before she left for LA, of us sitting on the ground of her empty bedroom, her head on my shoulder. That photo was the main focus of the wallpaper, but behind it were dozens of other polaroids of us and my friends and me and the things I loved and the people I loved. Of her.

If I'm honest, Mara has ruined me in the most beautiful way possible. We went to parks and movie theatres and arcades and cafes and she kissed me in every beautiful place in Seoul and I can never go back to those places without tasting her like blood in my mouth. And then when she left and now that she's forgotten me, I understand why storms are named after people.

I typed in my passcode; her birthday (I know I'm cliche and shit but you can't blame a boy for loving someone). I then rang someone who I knew I could confide in at this time, or rather some people.

'Hi...' I sniffled through the microphone. 'Can I meet you at that cafe near the dorms?... I'm fine... I'll explain when I see you... yeah I want them there too... I'll see you soon... bye...' I sniffed once more before hanging up and walking towards my destination.

***

I sat in the cafe, alone, my fingers tracing the rim of the empty cup in front of me.

My eyes were still damp with tears and bloodshot and my cheeks were still slightly red and blotchy from crying.

I looked around me at the happy people enjoying their coffee and the company of whoever they were with and it made me think that maybe I could-

'Hi Hyuck, we came as soon as we could. Is everything okay?' Mark sat down opposite me in the booth followed by Chenle and Jisung and Renjun, Jaemin and Jeno sat in beside me. 'How did it go? Is she okay? Why are you crying? Oh no something's wrong... what is it?'

The concern lacing his voice and the look on all of their faces made me lose it again. I buried my head in my hands and cried silently.

'It's okay Hyuck, take your time.' Jaemin rested a hand on my shoulder in reassurance.

I looked up and smiled thankfully, choked back tears and told them everything; how Mara forgot me and how bad things were, how there was nothing I thought I could do.

'Oh Haechan I'm so sorry.' Chenle whispered.
'I'll be back in a minute.' Renjun, who was sitting on the edge of booth on my side, got up and pointed towards the counter.

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