Is This a Pity Party?

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Okay, so this next chapter is just going to be Beckinsile adjusting to life without Ed at school...It'll be school but I'm going to make it a really short chapter; it's more of a filler chapter than anything else, so enjoy <3

Chapter 31:

Beckinsile's Point of view

I walk into school Monday morning and don't see the familiar head of flaming red hair sitting next to Fiona in Pre-calc. A wave of sadness washes over me as I realize that I'll never see Ed sitting in one of these seats ever again. I plop down next to her and she gives me a sad smile.

"I miss him too," Fiona pats my hand and then looks sullenly at the ground.

"I wonder what he's doing right now..." My voice trails off as Oliver takes the seat next to me.

"Is this the pity party?" Oliver smirks but we don't return it. "Too soon?"

"No, we're just sad right now..." I take his hand and intertwine our fingers.

"I'm sorry," Oliver says with a sympathetic look in his eyes.

Mr. Meyer begins lecturing and I can feel my mood worsening. I don't want to be here, I don't want to be lectured and I don't want to have to go through this every day until graduation. I sink lower in my chair and try my best to listen.


I've made it through my next few classes and am now making my way to lunch. I take a seat with Eli, Xander and Cody but don't talk. Oliver immediately starts a conversation with them and I do my best to stay out of it.

"What's wrong, Beckinsile?" Cody has a sincere look in his eyes.

"My friend left the school," I bite my lip and look down at the table.

"I'm sorry, Beckinsile...At least you still have us...We'll try to help in any way we can..." Cody gives me a small smile and I return it.

"Thanks, you guys are the best..." I join in the conversation after that; I'm glad they consider us friends because these guys are a lot of fun.


I walk outside and stand on the curb, awaiting my daily ride like I've done every day since tenth grade. Oliver follows me out and waits for me to realize that my ride isn't coming.

"You must think I'm an idiot..." I brush a tear from my eye and practically fall into his arms.

"I don't and I never will; I just think that Ed wouldn't want you to be sitting around all depressed, he'd want you to continue on, Becks." Oliver runs his fingers through my hair and holds me close.

"I know; I'll be back to normal by tomorrow."

"You don't have to be back to normal because nothing will be normal now; just have a smile on your face tomorrow and I'll be happy..." Oliver kisses my forehead and leads me to his motorcycle.

I hop on and he drives me home. After surviving the whole day without Ed, I feel a little better but Oliver's right; I don't think I'll ever be back to completely normal without Ed. Not having him around will take some serious getting used to.

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