Best-Friends with Issues

Chapter 11- Fight Club

~Conner~

"Are we gonna die?" Jerry asked curiously.

The ridiculously huge and intimidating henchmen surrounding us scowled in response, and one even started cracking his knuckles.

"Are you actually an idiot?" Tom hissed to his brother, glancing around nervously at the other men stuffed in the van. Yes, we had actually been kidnapped from a grocery store and stuffed into the back of a van. Like children. Aside from the fact that we were three teenage boys who no doubt lost all traces of our dignity, we had matched the cliche to a tee.

"What?" Jerry shrugged. "If I'm gonna be shot in the back of this van, I damn well wanna know about it in advance."

"So you can what? Prepare your will?" Tom scoffed, and I rolled my eyes. Only those two could still bicker like a married couple when we were moments away from being murdered and dumped in a ditch.

"Well I certainly can't leave my porn stash to the likes of you, so yeah, a will would be nice." Jerry crossed his arms over his chest , ignoring the glares he was getting from everyone in the car, including the particularly murderous one from Tom.

"If we both get out of this alive, I'm gonna kill you." Tom informed his twin.

The blond tilted his head questioningly in response, looking unbothered by the threat. "Does that mean Conner's gonna be the one to die?"

"Where did you get that idea?" I finally joined the conversation, giving up on not pissing off our captors. With Jerry in the car, it's not like I could make it any worse. "If anyone's gonna end up dead in this situation, it's definitely you J-man."

Jerry scoffed indignantly. "Says who?"

I looked around at our captors expectantly. "Raise of hands, who wants to shoot Jerry first?" Everyone in the van raised their hands, including Tom.

"That's just cold."

I sighed, covering my eyes and feeling the stress building up my headache. "Jerry, I will literally pay you to shut up now."

"How much?" He asked immediately.

"I'll pay you no attention."

"C-man!" He whined childishly. "That's not what you said last night!"

"I wish I had eaten you in the womb." Tom hissed at his twin crossly, glaring once more.

"Twin joke!" Jerry chuckled. "I love it! Can we do blond jokes next?"

"Forget it." I sighed again, this time in defeat. "At this rate, we're all gonna die. Jerry, I'm gonna haunt the shit outta you."

"But if we're all going to die, won't I be a ghost too? Can ghosts haunt other ghosts?" The idiot wondered aloud.

Before anyone could smack him, the van came to an abrupt halt, and all of our 'escorts' tumbled out of the car as fast as possible. I didn't blame them. At this point, I would've jump out of the car if it was still moving.

I heard a chorus of groans from the henchmen, and a few of them glance back to glare at us.

"Great, they're lumping us together with this idiot with a death wish." Tom commented to me scathingly, and I rolled my eyes.

Before Jerry could respond, likely with sarcasm and a perverted joke, George's head popped into vision as he peered in the van. He had ridden in a separate car, and had luckily been spared from Jerry. I was fairly certain that if he had ridden with us, we'd all be dead by now.

"There you are!" George said with mock pleasantness. It was all too obvious that he wanted to beat the shit out of us. "How was the car ride? Comfortable?"

"The only thing that could've made it better would be your beautiful smile, Greg." Jerry smiled wryly.

"It's George!" Godzilla roared. Fuming, he turned to his men. "Just grab them already!"

We were yanked out of the car by henchmen, and I noticed that two of the men had actually gone as far as to duck tape Jerry's mouth. I didn't blame them. "Mhhhhmm!" Jerry's words were muffled behind the tape, but even then I knew that they were complaints.

George grinned mockingly. "I've got something special planned for you three!"

I was shoved along behind Tom, Jerry still wordlessly protesting not far behind me. The henchmen were being purposefully rough, and one kept grabbing my ass.

After the fifth or so time this happened, I finally whipped my head around to glare at the perpetrator. "Dude! Hands off!"

The man only grinned sadistically, shoving my shoulders so that I stumbled forward and pinching my ass even harder. "Owww! Will you get the fuck off my butt? That's sexual harassment, you know!"

It was unsurprising that no one came to my rescue, though Tom did turn around to give me a sympathetic smile and a shrug. I huffed, and as he touched my rear end again I finally decided, screw it.

I whipped around and punched the guy square in the face.

He fell flat on his ass, the others openly gaping. I was instantly seized by the henchmen not guiding the twins, my arms restrained as I was basically carried along with the group.

But seeing the harasser moaning on the ground, clutching his bleeding nose, I couldn't help but speak. "Fuck being shot, that was so worth it."

~

"Holy mother of god." Tom muttered in awe, gaping at the sight before him.

Jerry was no better- though he still couldn't speak- his eyes were just about popping out of his head.

George stood in the boxing ring, his arms spread wide as he addressed the massive audience surrounding the ring. "Welcome to The Colosseum!"

"You just had to hit on the girlfriend of a gang leader, didn't you Jerry?" I hissed, narrowing my eyes at the flirty blond. He shrugged guiltily, not looking sorry at all, which only further pissed me off. I resisted the urge to smack him.

"Who's ready to see some fighting?" George called, and the audience roared in approval.

The warehouse reeked of marijuana and booze and god only knows what else, and with the way that everyone was dressed like either a thug or a stripper, it was safe to assumed that we were completely surrounded by unsavory criminals and gang members.

George looked across the room to where we were standing, a maniacally smug grin on his face. "I have a feeling that tonight's gonna be another bloody one, and I've got the perfect guys for the job!"

I couldn't help it, I reached over to punch Jerry in the side.

~

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Done!

Sorry it took so long, it's been pretty hectic with school starting back up. How was everyone's new school year?

Tell me what you think!