I blinked as my vision focussed to a small hand waving around in my face.
"Joe? Where's he headed? JOE!" Scott hissed into my ear. It was the first time I had heard Scott mad. It surprised me.
"Just let me drive and bring the laptop along with the page of that map on it." I said simply.
"But where's he-" Scott started.
"You'll see." I snapped. I knew it wasn't really fair of me to get mad at Scott. But when I'm upset, I usually hide my sad emotions and sometimes a more angry part of me peeks through.
Scott nodded, and followed me out into the car, the laptop under his arm. Scott started sharing stories that I only half listened to. I was more focussed on trying to remember the street names from that night and connect them to the names on the map for where to go.
After a while when Scott's voice grew more and more annoying I switched the radio on. A blasting song came on, with a lot of background beat and a male singer.
"Never let you go,
Never let you go." Sang the male voice during the chorus.
My heart sank, as I reached to change the station. I wish I hadn't let Caspar go. As I tried to switch the station, my hand was blocked by what felt like another hand?
I looked up, "Sorry but I can't let you change the station," Scott said with a sheepish smile, "This is Caspar and I's song."
I felt a pang of jealousy. Caspar and I never had a song. I moved his hand away and changed the station anyway. I saw Scott cross his arms and scowl but he didn't complain.
I squinted my eyes and looked up for a street sign. We were heading down Rocky Road. This was it. This was the way.
"We're almost there. We just have to continue down this road and we'll be there." I said, more to myself than Scott.
We drove down the gravel for a few minutes before the car stopped. I knew what had happened before we even got out. The tire must have went over something that popped it.
Scott got out first, and then I. The back right tire had ran over a shard of glass.
"Well, shit." I cursed under my breath, my eyebrows furrowing together.
I looked at Scott, "We're going to have to walk the rest of the way. It's kind of a long way, but there's no cell phone reception up here." He nodded.
I know I had told Scott we were going to walk, but I couldn't help but run. I knew Scott must have been far behind me but I didn't care.
I ran for as long as I could before I grew too tired to continue. My head was spinning, my body weak. I needed water. I had forgotten to drink any this morning. I was badly dehydrated and going to faint at any time. I heard Scott, out of breath, run up to my side, then walk at the same pace as me. I was too tired to say anything to him.
"Are we almost there?" I heard Scott sigh.
I looked up from the ground for the first time in a while, and just stared. I stopped in my tracks so Scott did the same. Caspar was standing at the edge of the cliff. Just staring down. He must have heard us walking up, so he turned around and faced us. His eyes weren't blank. They were just sad.
"CASPYYYY!" Scott yelled, running over to Caspar, wrapping his arms around him, and pulling him away from the cliff slightly. I walked up next to them.
"Caspar," It was hard to speak, but I forced myself, "You're my best friend. I can't loose you. I know you visited me every day in the hospital and it means more than I can ever say. You mean the world to me. I don't want to live without you. Please don't leave me. Don't move out." I pleaded.
"He's a liar," I heard Scott whisper into Caspar's ear, he whispered it loud enough for me to hear, "He didn't even remember you until the nurse told him. He didn't even help look for you. I had to do everything. He just came so he wouldn't look bad. Don't trust him. He told me he thought you were annoying and useless. You were messy and a bother in his life."
"What the fuck, Scott? That's not true!" I screamed, tears stinging in my eyes. What was happening.
"Tell the truth, Joe. Why are you here?" Was Caspar actually going to believe Scott? And why was Scott even lying?
"Because.. I love you, Caspar!"
"As a friend?" Caspar asked, an odd look in his eyes.
"As a best friend." I corrected.
"How cruel. He even knows you like him in a romantic way, so he tells you he loves you to play with your emotions but in the end he means it in only a friend way." Scott said, kicking dirt my direction.
"What are you talking about? How would I know he liked me romantically.. IF he even did." I glared at Scott.
"Are you fucking kidding me," Caspar laughed, "I CONFESSED TO YOU. I told you I liked you, you said it back but you meant it as a friend way. When I tried to explain I liked you as more than that you said I know. You rejected me."
"What? I said I liked you romantically back, but when you started explain our way of liking each other wasn't the same I was sure that you meant you just said it in a friendly way and tried to explain that since I had just confessed! That's why I said I know. I thought you were rejecting me."
"Do you.. still like me?" Caspar asked, I could hear a sad hint of hopefulness in his tone.
"I'm sorry, Cas. After the um.. incident, I realized I wasn't like that." Lies. I still liked him. But I wouldn't allow myself too. I don't live the life of someone who gets beaten up. I don't live the life of someone who would get bullied constantly. I just want to blend in and life peacefully.
"See? He doesn't care about your feelings. Caspar, come live with me. I like you.. romantically. I know you may not feel that way about me yet, and even if you never feel that way I will always care about you." Scott looked directly at me, "And I'll never forget you like he did. You mean too much to me." Scott protectivaly wrapped an arm around Caspar, so his sweatshirt arm was lifted a little revealing a bit of skin on his arm.
Holy shit. How had I not realized it sooner? Tatttoos covered the bit of arm I saw on Scott. That's why I had recognized his voice. His voice was the younger sounded one in the gang that beat me up. He was in love with Caspar, I was an obstacule so he tried to get rid of me.
"Caspar! Scott is.. he's in the gang that beat me up! He has the tattoos! And his voice! I remember his voice now! Caspar!" Tears of frusteration streamed down my face. I had to get Caspar to trust me.
"How convinient that he remembered his right now of all times. I've been talking to him a lot. He's lying obviously as a last resort. You can't trust him. He's a liar." Scott said, staring at Caspar.
Caspar looked confused and lost. He opened his mouth to speak, but my vision was fading, my head growing dizzy. I felt my body falling backwards. I looked up to the sky as my vision blurred slowly to a black, as I felt myself falling alongside the cliff. Caspar's face came into view as he stood staring over the cliff, watching me fall. He screamed something I couldn't hear. And then everything went dark.
--A/N Sorry for so many chapters of Joe's POV. I don't really want to give away exactly what's been going through Caspar's mind yet haha.
Alsoo it won't let me reply to comments right now for some reason but tysm for commenting on this O: I can't believe people are actually reading it TT-TT <- Tears of joy.
Alsoo I changed the cover because I liked it more :P
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He Loves Me... Not? || Jaspar Fanfic (Caspar lee x Joe Sugg)Fanfiction
"Friends can cuddle, right?" I asked, inching closer to Joe. "Yeah." Joe said, opening one eye adorably to look at me. "They can kiss too?" I whispered, his scent alone sending chills up my spine.