They say things will always get better, but they never do.
I draw the blade across my flesh, the stream of blood follows as always. *ding* my iPod screen flashes and I see I that I have a text on the messanger app Kik. It's Emily, my girlfriend. I put down my blade and open my iPod to see what she wants. "James whats the matter? You havent taked to me in hours, I'm really worried about you babe". I turn off the noise for the messages and put it face down. I look at my arm, there are about 8 new cuts and 16 scars. I get the roll of toliet roll i keep and start to clear off the blood, I hear my Mum calling me for dinner, I pull on my black hoodie and head downstairs then take my place at the table and stare at my food as always. I wait till my family has finished eating then get up and go back to my room without touching my food. I stay up late listening to music and watching TV, I go to sleep at 4am.
2. Emily Finds out
People say they will help, but sometimes, they make it a lot worse.
I'm listening to my music when I get a text from Emily on Kik, "James for for god's sake you havent talked to me in ages, I want to know what's wrong with you tell me please James sweetheart". I don't know what to do, do I tell her I've been cutting for weeks? or do I try and lie and tell her theres nothing wrong? I pick up my iPod and select the option to send her a picture, I take pictures of both of my arms, both covered in cuts and scars. I tell her "this is whats wrong". She looks at the pictures and texts me back, "OMG James why didn't you tell? How long have you been doing this?". "A few weeks, and I didnt tell you because.... I was scared how you would react". I reply, she texts back right away "James really you should of told me, I will help you though this, for as long as it takes".