I had realized for a while now that I am in love with my best friend. In fact, I realized when I first met him. Every thing about Louis is just so... Amazing. His bright sea green eyes always light up like a Christmas tree. They always have a youthful sparkle in them. His smile is one of the most perfect, beautiful smiles I have ever seen in my entire life. It gives me butterflies every time i see it (which is usually a lot). Lou's personality is just amazing. He's always so perky and happy, it's like he's never in a bad mood. he has the best sense of humor, so childish. I love just goofing around with him. I feel so comfortable with Louis. I can always be myself whenever he's around. Lou makes me feel like no one has ever made me feel before. I feel so cared for, he's always there to comfort me whenever things get bad, he's always right by my side, so loyal. I can talk to him about absolutely ANYTHING. Well except for one thing...that I love him... I can't tell him that. Absolutely not. It will ruin our friendship. I know he wont feel the same way. In fact I'm 100% positive. He's straight. He even has a beautiful girlfriend who he is madly in love with. Even worse, she treats him like crap. He deserves better. So much better. If he were mine, i would treat him like he deserved to be treated, because he is the most important thing in the world to me, he deserves nothing less than perfect. It crushes me inside to see how horribly she treats him. Can't she see how lucky she is to have such a perfect boyfriend?!?! But at least Lou is happy. That's the most important thing to me. No matter how much it kills me inside.
Some days I think about telling him how I feel. He's my best friend. I hate keeping things from him. I know he won't judge me, he's not that kind of person. But still, deep down I know it's a bad idea. Even if he doesn't judge me, it will still make things different between us. I don't want to make him feel uncomfortable around me, soit's best to keep it a secret from him. Forever. No matter how much it KILLS me to keep such a big secret from the best friend i had ever had.
Thanks for reading :) Sorry if there's any mistakes, I tried my best to edit it. I know it isn't great, but i think its okay for my first! I will update as soon as I can, so sometime this week hopefully. Please comment or inbox me your thoughts :)