Better Without Me

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Tonight you lye here wrapped in my arms

The first time in a long time that I know you’re really mine

Your heart is beating with mine

Keeping the same pace

Your breath warms my neck

As I gently caress your face

I look into your eyes and I see a soul

Broken like mine

Your eyes look up to me

Mine look down to yours

I just can’t hold in the hate anymore

When I hold you or touch you

Can you feel that inside you?

The demons invading your soul

That’s me

That’s my darkness

That’s all I have inside all that you get from staying here

From loving me

From wanting me to stay near

You’re beautiful and innocent yet you’re broken inside

And I know that for that the fault is all mines

You look to me with love

I look to you with hate

You don’t deserve any of this damn pain

And yet you stick around

Why would you stay?

All I’m going to do is hurt you anyway

GIRL:

You say you’re a monster

I’ve heard it so many times

You ask me why I love you

I have nothing to say

I don’t know why I love you

That’s my only reply

But I think I might have an idea

I tell you

I love you because you’re the only one who keeps me from going insane

I love you because you’re the only you

And none are even close to the same

I love you because when you hold me tight

Instead of feeling I don’t belong

You make living this life feel right

I love you because though you say you have only darkness inside

I see the heart that you try to hide

I love you because you’re not a monster

Only a lover who’s broken inside

I love you because I know you love me too

And I love you

Because you’re you

BOY:

I break down in tears after what you have said

You’re the only one who can understand

I see the monster

You see my heart

Even though I have broken you apart

You look at me

And you see all the good

I see all the things I’ve done and they’ve hurt you

I see the demons that eat me away

I see the never ending pain

Yet you look at me and you see someone to love

I don’t know how you see it but you do

I can’t change my feelings about me

But I know I still hate to love you

If I didn’t care I would be gone

Then you would be alright

I tell you goodbye and walk out the door with tears in my eyes

When I get home I see no one is there

Good I mutter to myself

This is the day I go to hell

Baby I love you

But you need to see

Life would be so much better without me

GIRL:

I try to call you

But you won’t pick up

I keep trying

I won’t give up

The fourth time I call

Someone picks up

And I expect to hear your voice

Then a man speaks who I don’t recognize

He tells me not to call this number again

And I ask him why

He softly and gently replies

He tells me you’ve committed suicide

Suddenly tears fill my eyes

He tells me the story of how he found you

Face down on the ground

With the gun in your hand

And a puddle of blood by your head

He asks me my name

Then tells me you left me a letter behind

I ask him to bring it over to my house

When he arrives I start to read:

You couldn’t see the monster, but that was the real me

There was no heart inside of me

I told you the demons were all that lived BOY:

And they were all I could ever give

I knew this was for the best

So maybe with my last breath or with my death

You would realize finally

Life is so much better without me.

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