I had just confronted Joe about our conversation. He looked shaken and nervous. He was probably scared of me, I mean he had just found out that I liked him. And worst of all he had rejected me, and even when he said we could still be friends he clearly didn't look like he meant. it. Maybe Zoe was wrong. Maybe I really did screw everything up.
I texted Zoe.
CASPAR: Zoeeee :( I just confessed to Joe and he doesn't like me in that way! And when I asked if we could still be friends he just seemed awkward and insincere when he said we could.
ZOE: Awww Caspar I'm so sorry! :L Why don't a few of us come over and have a small party? We can loosen Joe up so things won't be awkward. I'm here for you.
CASPAR: Okay see ya. I'm gonna go wallow in self pity now byeeee :'(
ZOE: Text me or call me for anything, I'm here for you. There are other fish in the sea!
CASPAR: STFU with ur cliche sayings :P
ZOE: Love you too!
I felt a little better after talking to Zoe. I must say it was a bit awkward talking to Zoe about my rejection from her brother, but she was the only one I could talk to and trust with serious topics.
I slipped out of my clothes, leaving them on the floor as I searched for a new outfit. I was only in my boxers as I was searching for a new outfit.
"Caspar, have you seen the-" I heard Joe's voice trail off. I spun around. Originally I would have made some joke about how Joe walked in on me in my boxers, but now doing that would only make things more awkward. I could feel his eyes run up and down my body and I became immediately self concious. I was happy with my appearance so I'm not usually self concious but something about Joe always got me nearvous. But him looking at me was probably just my imagination. His face turned bright red as he murmerred sorry and rushed out of the room.
I quickly slipped on a shirt and slid on a pair of jeans and ran over to Joe's room, "Just a heads up, people are coming over later tonight."
The old Joe would have asked what people were coming and when but this Joe was still bright red, and he only nodded. Oh God. I had messed up things even more than I thought.
The doorbell rang, breaking the awkwardness. I smiled and ran to the door.
"Friendssss, welcome!" I said, opening my arms and smiling at all of them. Zoe walked in, Alfie right at her side followed by Tyler, Troye, Hannah and Marcus.
"Let's get right down the party! And by party I mean drinking. Mama needs a drink and now." Tyler's loud voice filled the room followed by his trademark laugh.
I felt better already, and all my feelings of awkwardness escaped. Joe walked out hearing the commotion, "Oh. Hi." He said, smiling at all them.
"Honey, you look like you need a drink." Tyler said to Joe, pouring him a glass of vodka and putting it into Joe's hand. Joe began to drink it. I wanted to keep watching Joe, but Zoe pulled me away.
"So how are you?" She asked with earnest concern in her eyes.
"I'm holding up." I said, pouring myself a glass, "I just need to get drunk and try to forget today happened." I said smiling and laughing. We all drank until we were drunk.
"Let's play truth or dare!" Hannah announced, and we all sat elementary style in a circle on the ground.
"Alfie, truth or dare?" Hannah asked.
"Dare!" Marucs said boldly, a wide smile across his face.
"I dare you to kiss Troye." Hannah said, a slow smile spreading across her face, as Marcus's smile loosened. I looked over at Troye, and he looked fine with it. Not happy but not disgusted. However out of the corner of my eye, I spotted a hint of jealousy in Tyler's eyes.
Marcus leaned in and pecked Troye's lips. Everyone cheered and laughed.
"Okayyyy! Caspar! Truth or dare!" Marucs said.
I smiled, "Truth!"
"Playing it safe I see. Is it true you have a crush on Zoe?" Marucs slurred.
I looked over at Joe, worried for a moment that he might say something like, "No, Caspar confessed to me." But then I remembered Joe wasn't like that. i hoped. I didn't really understand him lately, and said no. Joe's face looked oddly twisted. I hoped he wouldn't tell everyone about me. He was drunk, so who knows what he might say.
"I don't believe you!" Marcus said teasingly, and I only laughed. I knew they all knew I didn't like Zoe, even though Alfie placed an arm around Zoe's shoulder defensively.
"Well, it's gotten late already. I think I'm gonna crash. See you." Joe said, his tone odd. Mad? Sad? I couldn't tell. Joe wasn't easy to read like I was.
Zoe checked the time on her phone, "Wow how time flies. I guess we better head out too." She said, and mouthed Good luck to me as she walked out, followed by everyone else. The apartment seemed oddly and uncomfortably quiet now that everyone else had left.
I stepped into Joe's room, and hoped to fix things between us.
He layed on his bed, his eyes closed, "Joe?" I said.
His eyes opened, "Caspar." He slurred in a drunk tone.
I opened my mouth to speak but he spoke first, "I love you Caspar. I know you don't feel the same way, but you're so fucking perfect." Joe said, smiling at me so adoreably.
My jaw dropped, a thousand questions flew through my mind. But instead of asking them all, I said was, "I love you too. As more than a friend." I added the last part so there would be no misinterpritations.
Joe stood, and made his way over to me, he took one hand and pressed it on my chest, and pushed me against the wall, "I need to see that perfect chest again." He said, fumbling with my shirt, as I helped him remove it. His hand rubbed against my chest, as his face grew close to mine. I stared into his eyes and a split second later his lips were on mine. It was a sloppy drunken kiss, but it was still a kiss.
"I love you Joe Sugg."
"I love you more Caspar Lee."
And then everything went black.
I woke up on the floor of Joe's room, my shirt removed. I blinked a couple times, my head spinning and pulsing in pain. I tried to remember everything that happened. But I couldn't remember anything beyond the truth or dare game, let alone why I was in Joe's room. I remembered a group of our friends coming over and Marcus kissing Troye. Everything beyond that was blank. I figured that nothing eventful happened besides us partying anyway, so I didn't bother to hurt my head worse and try to search my memory. I was still unsure of why I was toppless on Joe's floor but I figured I had removed my shirt while drunk and somehow mistook Joe's room for mine and just crashed. Joe was still sleeping, so I found my shirt and walked back into my room.
-- A/N Hahahah I bet some of you were thinking I was making the story go too quickly but fear not.
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He Loves Me... Not? || Jaspar Fanfic (Caspar lee x Joe Sugg)Fanfiction
"Friends can cuddle, right?" I asked, inching closer to Joe. "Yeah." Joe said, opening one eye adorably to look at me. "They can kiss too?" I whispered, his scent alone sending chills up my spine.