Designed for Submission

Chapter 6

Aiden sits upright immediately, and begins mumbling under his breath. "Shit. I can't believe we...No! This can't happen...You're my friend...I'm sorry, E..."

I put my hand on his thigh in an effort to comfort him, but it seems to only make him more distressed. "It's okay, Aiden. I wanted you to, but it just brought back some bad memories."

He looks at me with a pained expression, then confusion returns to cloud his face. "Do you like me that way, E?"

"Yes." His eyes widen and then shut tight like he's thinking very hard about something. Oh, no. I can't ever bear to see people struggling like this. I just want to make this all better. I'll do anything if it means he won't feel like this.

His eyes open and he cups my cheek again. "E, I want you to understand that I really do care about you," he begins. "But we can't be anything more than just friends."

What? I never thought that I would ever want to be more than friends, but now that I think about it, I think I might like that with Aiden. But he doesn't want me. That hurts.

"Don't think to hard about it. I'm just not right for you," he says, like he read my mind and is trying to prevent me from the hurt this is causing.

"I don't understand," I whisper.

"Your experience with Jay. It makes anything between you and I impossible."

"What? Why? You think I'm a slut, too?" tears prick at the corners of my eyes. I thought he didn't care about that. I thought he believed me. Nobody's going to take you seriously again, Elena. Deal with it. I can no longer contain my tears and begin to sob.

"No, E! That's not it at all!" He sounds exasperated. "It's not you, it's me. Don't give me that look. I'm not being cliche, I'm being serious. There's something I have to confess."

What? I just stare at him, not knowing what the hell I'm supposed to do. He sighs and draws in a very big breath like he has to work up the courage to say something.

"I'm a dominant."

That is not what I expected. My eyes widen and I shift backwards, releasing my cheek from his hand and putting space between us. He looks so guilty. Holy, shit! He's telling me the truth. What the hell? I can't believe what I'm hearing.

"I-I...Elena," he sighs. "Before I came here, I had a girlfiend that asked me to do things with her. I fell in love with the feeling of control and power."

I don't say anything and he continues. "We've only known each for a little while, E. And the amount of trust and love that the kind of relationship I need is almost unrealistically high. I would like for you to be my girlfriend one day. I already care for you so much and I want to give you everything and make you happy. It just can't happen right now. And given your history with this side of things I doubt it will ever happen."

He stops as his breath hitches in his throat. He drops his gaze and shakes his head slightly. My heat aches to see him so vulnerable. During this whole time we've known each other, he's the one that's been comforting me and taking care of me. I trust him, but this is just way out in left field. Despite my feelings, I put my hands on his tense shoulders and kneed my fingers into his muscles.

"Aiden, it's okay. I'm still your friend. Please don't feel bad. But I agree, we can't ever be more than just friends."

His head shoots up. "You don't think I'm disgusting?"

I snort at him. Doesn't he see how ironic this is? "No."

"Oh, thank you!" He pulls me into a tight hug and nuzzle his noze in my hair. After what seems like ages, he finally sits back and looks at me, trying to assess how I am.