Chapter 17: Jackass Jenkins

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Rolfe would never cheat on me. He's a good guy. He would never do such a thing to me. I crumple the piece of paper and toss it in the bin. I have far more important things to deal with than some false rumor.

When I get home, I start working on my paper. I have to pull an all nighter and I'm still not finished. Around 4 AM I fell asleep on my keyboard and I woke up to a higher word count. I was shocked but then I realized my nose had pressed the "h" key about thirty billion times and I had to spend a few minutes deleting six pages of "h's" as well as wiping drool off my keyboard.

I decide to rest my eyes for a few minutes and before I know it it's already 10 AM and I'm late for school. 

The stupid paper is due in less than 24 hours and there's no way I can crank out another 7 and a half pages just tonight in addition to drafting and correcting my many mistakes. So I do what I never though I'd ever do: I ditch school.

Well not exactly, "ditching", I called the school and pretended to be sick.

I'm a good student and I never break the rules, but now my perfect attendance is tarnished and I may as well spend the day finishing the paper. After all, I don't have any parents living with me to scold me for ditching. They're still in Africa shooting for National Geographic. I think they'll be back sometime around winter break. 

But in the meantime, dickhead Jenkins is making this grade be worth half of the semester so it's important I do well so I can maintain my GPA.

A few more hours pass and I'm still working on the topic sentence of paragraph three. I can't decide between: "Blackened teeth in Elizabethan society was a sign of high status because that signified being able to afford sugarcane, which was a delicacy shipped in from the Indies." or "Consequent of their ability to afford sugarcane as well as their lacking toothbrush technology, the wealthy citizens often had blackened teeth, which encouraged lower class woman would to smear dirt onto their teeth in order to look rich."

Both are shit. I'm doomed.

On the bright side, all my research is done. Now I just need to blend all these little factoids seamlessly into the perfect paper and use bullshitting as the glue to hold it together, which is a thousand times easier said than done.

In conclusion: Fuck you, Kevin.

I decide to take a break after a few more hours. My brain is actually mush and I need it to perk back up again so I can finish this paper and do all the rest of my homework. I pick up my phone to find sixteen missed texts from Chelsea asking where I am. I reply, telling her I'm "sick". She sends back a winky face emoji. She takes personal days all the time with the "sick" excuse so she understands and finds it amusing that I used her tactic, which first of all, is not her tactic. Every teenager uses that excuse when they're overwhelmed and want a day off.

I guess you could say I have a lot going on right now. First off, Hanley nearly assaults me again, I find out my boyfriend has been lying to me about Homecoming night, and now I get this note that says he's cheating on me! Well, on the bright side, I finished my paper.

It took me all day to do it but I finished it.

Now time to edit... holy crap.


I walk into school the next day as a zombie, but nonetheless, relieved. This morning I printed out my paper, gave it a kiss for good luck, and tucked it neatly into the front pocket of my backpack. 

Math class today was particularly boring but I was relieved when our teacher let us work on homework in partners for the last fifteen minutes.

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